Wednesday, November 10, 2021

My View From The Cheap Seats

 Another week has rolled by at a pretty fast pace.  It usually drags when I'm home alone, in spite of Coopers continuous play-with-me requests.   This week seemed to just disappear.  It's again time for the Magic Kingdom of Bingo!!   In fact, the Elks will be taking up lots of my time this week.

I arrived early enough, only to find I was alone in the upstairs turret, seeking refreshment of the cola kind. I've been there so often lately, the bartender just hands me a coke without me even asking.  It's kind of like Cheers, only this time there were no people!!

At the appointed time ... 4:00 ... I headed down to the dungeon to prepare for the usually light crowd.  You can always tell when people get paid.  The first and last weekends of the month, we are swamped with peasants.  The middle two weeks involve lots of change from broken piggy banks.  I'm sure lots of little kids are crying about that!!  Surprisingly, this night was very crowded.

So here I am, seated at the infernal machine.  It's bright little light covers up a dark heart.  If it can mess you up, it will in spades.  Of course it's never operator error!!!

We sold cards like crazy until 6:30.  That was the magic hour my carriage was going to turn back into a pumpkin if I didn't get to the Pumpkin Patch to pick up my check.  I conned a very nice lady into operating the infernal machine until I returned.  It was a very quick trip.

Upon my return, knowing there were 126 peasants in attendance and NO places to park, I took the first spot I came to.  It was the Elks Manager slot.  I just prayed I wouldn't get towed.

Back in time for the main games, this is my view from the cheap seats.  The sheets on the table are the cards players fight over tooth and nail.  Mostly nails, since everyone has had their Christmas best glued to their fingertips with rhinestones and glitter.  If they didn't spend so much on those claws, they probably wouldn't have to break the grandkids piggy bank!!

There was lots of shouting and yelling from the restless peasants, but no rolling-on-the-floor fights this time, nor did we have to call the police.  As you can imagine, there are many very old folks who have trouble seeing the numbers.  That would be us running the games.  The peasants are even worse.  

There was one big altercation because a sweet old lady won twice with the same card.  She didn't SEE the first Bingo, and only yelled the magic word when she got the SECOND bingo on the same card.  Everyone thought she should have been paid twice.  Sorry, but it doesn't work that way, however she did get her $250 for the win.

This is where the time change hits me smack in the face.  I usually go home around 10:00.  NOW I'm not going home until 11:00 ... WAY past my bedtime!!  I was yawning right and left while trying to count out the last of the payouts to keep the peasants happy.  

That's when a miracle happened!  Our new Kitchen Koordinator who buys all the food for the peasants, since it cannot be co-mingled with Elkdom food, gets an A+ every single week.  She picks up goodies from far and wide, which brings in even more cash to the coffers. 

Any leftovers that cannot be saved, are passed out to the hardworking volunteers of the King's castle.  Look what I scored!!  If this doesn't say Thanksgiving, I don't know what does.  PECAN PIE!  Now I have to go to the store and get whipped cream before partaking of this excellent contribution to my weight.  Maybe I'll even buy the ingredients to make my own.

 In other great news of the night, all the volunteers get paid in turkeys for Thanksgiving.  Those who show up and work most of the time, as well as volunteering for other activities, are granted one whole (usually huge) bird for their eating pleasure.  

Of course it helps when you say yes to the King's request to serve food and drink at the next great celebration ... the Sunday Fizz Brunch!!  So I guess you know where I will be this Sunday.

I'm going back to bed now for a few more minutes of shut eye before heading back to the Elks for a meeting of the accounting minds.  Me thinks a piece of that pie might just wake me up enough for that!!


  1. Just don't understand WHY we can't stay on one time like Arizona does? It is nice having the sun coming up around 7, so why can't we just stay on this non-daylight savings time....

    1. I totally agree. It just messes everyone up and doesn't save anything. Especially the Elks meetings I have to go to because now I'm never home before 10:00 pm.

  2. Replies
    1. Mine too Bill!!! So happy you are on your way South!!

  3. Back at the Bingo! You go-getter!
    Yummy, pecan pie. Just a teensy piece for me please. ;)
    You just need 35% whipping cream to make the topping. you could add some sugar. A long expiration date on that cream too so I ALWAYS have it in the fridge.

    1. I'm with you Patsy ... except that teensy piece always seems to be BIG!! LOL.