Monday, July 3, 2017

It's In My Nose .....

First off, I'd like to say my heart and prayers go out to Nick and Miss Terry regarding Nick's daughter Tiffany.  Please say a few words on her behalf to the Man up above.  They need everyone's help.

After arriving home Saturday, I wasn't surprised to find my refrigerator looking rather empty.  I unloaded some necessities and crashed on the couch.  I really was highly motivated to get things done, I just couldn't get anything in gear.

It didn't take long to find out I only had TWO lean cuisines boxes left, and if I didn't want to starve to death, I better get to the grocery store.
My original plan was for a lot of make-ahead dinners.  With the Fourth of July just around the corner, I thought some smoked pork would be a nice change of pace.  I bought salmon.  Don't ask me why ... it just looked good.  It's a quick cook in a hot pan, with two minute Instant Pot green beans.  I cheated on the rice ... I bought one of those packets of heat-and-serve.  THAT was a big mistake.  It's tastes terrible.  I mean REALLY terrible.

In spite of the exhaust fan screaming over my stove, my house smelled like salmon.  There's nothing like the fragrance of FISH in your nose.
Then I thought ... why not try smoking a chicken?  I've never done that before and my cemetery still has a few spaces available.  I had no recipe to go by, but who knows, this 8 pound beauty just might turn out delicious.  Hope springs eternal.
Next up .... pork shoulder.  I tried to get three of them about the same weight so they would all be done together.  It didn't exactly turn out that way.  With the smoker ready to go, I wasn't sure what should go where.  In my tiny brain I thought the pork should be on top where it's hotter.  That was probably wrong.  I placed them in the smoker and walked away.
Three hours later, the smell of wood smoke wafted through the house.  I went out to take a look see.  As soon as I opened the door, I was hit with a wave of smoky goodness.  RATS ... now I reek of smoke.  It's in my nose, my hair, my clothes and now in the house because I forgot to close the back door.

The chicken was holding it's own on the bottom shelf.  I guesstimated in another two hours it would be done.  A quick check with my thermometer would let me know.  I opened the door again ... another wave of smoke in my face ... and WHAT???  The chicken had big round spots all over it!!  It looked like it had chicken pox!!  The juice from the meat above ruined the beautiful appearance of the chicken.  Well shucks!!  
I was so distressed, I even forgot to take a picture.  I wrapped it in foil to rest.  An hour later, it didn't look any better, so I cut it up for lunches and will pack it in the freezer this morning.  I have to say it DID taste yummy ... except really, I can only taste the smoke smell.

At 5:00 this morning I jumped up and rushed out to check the pork, which had by then spent 12 hours in the cooker.  The difference in size between the roasts is readily apparent.  The biggest 4-1/2 pound piece is perfect ... the others a little on the dry side I fear, but nothing a cupful of barbecue sauce won't fix.  It's always a toss of the dice when it comes to smoking.  
By now, all I can smell is smoke, all I can taste is smoke and I know "I" smell like smoke too, not to mention my house and back yard.  

One of these roasts will go to a friends house for their Fourth celebration, with the other two packed up for my freezer.  If I see you on down the road, I'll be happy to share so you TOO can have the smell of smoke in YOUR nose!!

So I'm off to the couch for some sleep.  Fireworks are big around here with BIG dummies setting off blasts as loud as what the City does.  Miss Jessie is scared of loud noises.  She hot-footed around the bed most of the night.  Every time she moved, Cooper growled, which instantly caused a fight.  I tried putting them out of the bedroom ... they just scratched at the door.  

My time here is short and I'm behind schedule already.  I'll let you know more tomorrow.  YAWN!


  1. Been a few big booms around here, and Skruffy just hates it! Bubba, well, he just goes on sleeping...

    1. Same with Cooper Dave ... he could care less!! Tonight will be the worst!!

  2. It maybe too late but if you stop by the pet store they have ( over the counter )a calming pill for dogs it's like giving them a Real mild tranquilizer and it comes them down
    If I see the refrigerator right, you get peanut butter and mangoes they go good together that's a balanced meal
    If you have any coffee beans
    Put a quarter of a cup of coffee BEANS and a high sided skillet Add 1/2 cup of water
    Bring to a medium boil let the steam come out unto you boil off all the water discard the beans. that'll take this wood smell out of your house but it'll change it to the coffee smell

    1. I think you've got something there Ed ... coffee certainly would smell better than smoke!!

  3. Never have done any Smoking Meats because it takes time that I don't have. Throw it on the grill and get it done.
    Be Safe and Enjoy!

    It's about time.

    1. It does take time Rick. I guess I just love the challenge. If you do it right, it turns out great!!

  4. Does Miss Jessie have a thunder shirt? I have friends who swear by them.

    1. No she does not, but I'm thinking that just might be a really good idea. Thanks Linda!!