Mad Hatter Joins Butler

When I sit home alone too long, my brain starts working faster than my body can keep up.  Every year, Halloween is my favorite holiday to decorate for.  In fact, it's usually done at LEAST by the 15th.   Between the Pumpkin Patch and being sick, I've been falling behind.

While on the couch half asleep on Sunday, I remembered my Mad Hatter hat I purchased at Disneyland probably ten or twelve years ago.  I never had a chance to use it.  In a few short seconds I had my outfit laid out in my mind.  Hat, jacket, boots ..... I even went so far as to hit the third drawer in the bathroom where all the weird makeup resides.

Amazingly, the clown white is still in good shape.  This may work out after all!!

Or not!!  After some unacceptable side effects from the Amox-Clav meds, I made a call to the Doctor's Office for a replacement.  You know how they are ... it took some talking ... but I came home yesterday with some new meds.  It's the Z-pak I asked for in the first place.  Now feeling rather punky and puny, I'm not sure the costume will make an appearance.

I'm actually going to work at the Patch this morning for two quick seed classes.  I'm hoping to get paid in pumpkins for the porch.  Now if I can just get that outside outlet to work so the butler can talk to the kids when they walk up, I'll be WAY ahead of the game.

My New Housemate!

The new woman my Doctor promised has not materialized.  Every time I look in the mirror, I see the same old one staring back at me!!

Well enough to be bored, I finally decided on a trip to the grocery store.  Jonathan was completely out of fresh fare, which he requires every day.  With my coughing now to a minimum, I felt pretty good about finding new vittles.

Back home with the fixins' for some comfort tuna and noodles (and TV dinners for a week), I began to plan for the homecoming of my housemate.  He comes out from his storage bin every Halloween to scare little kids on the front porch.  Trust me, he scares the big kids too.  It's amazing how realistic his skin and face look.

I stood him up, tried to straighten his suit, then walked out of the kitchen.  When I returned a short five seconds later, he scared me to death.  THERE'S SOMEONE IN THE KITCHEN!!  I was half way to the bedroom for my weapon of choice with adrenalin pumping before it dawned on me.  Nancy, you're such a dummy!!

I knew this was going to happen again and again until his night watch duty.  I tried covering him up with a sheet, but it didn't help.  Finally, I drug him into my spare bathroom and shut the door ... or at least I THOUGHT I did.

This morning as I turned around with two bowls full of dog food, I got the same scare again.  Well you little RAT!!!  It's going to be a  L O N G  week!!

I think I'll wander over to the Pumpkin Patch this afternoon for some pumpkins.  If I'm going to decorate my front porch, they are a MUST.

At long last, I'm feeling MUCH better!!

My Sad Fridge!

I'm finally feeling like I just might survive this nasty stuff.  It sure seems like the older I get, the harder this stuff is to get rid of.  Don't know if that's due to age or if the bugs are getting stronger.  Lucky for me, this time I didn't get the horrendous sore throat that usually accompanies the crud.

With my sad fridge looking pretty bare, I definitely need to hit the store today.  It will be a good test to see just how far I've come.  I turned those chicken breasts into chicken tenders, although they were tough as nails.  Should have pounded them out first, a thought that never entered my crud-filled brain.  There's one egg left in the carton, but that's for Jonathan.

Cooper, sweet boy, spent the entire day with me on the couch, as did Miss Jessie.  I think I watched every single episode of Yukon Vet.  I WOULD have watched the Yankees lose, but Direct TV saw fit to exclude it from my viewing area.

Here's a snapshot of my Seed Planting Classroom.  Just imagine 75 kids crowded around those six wooden tables.  That was due to a schedule mixup.  It's hard enough to keep the kids in line ... the teachers are even worse.  I was escorting 150 from the buses to the Time Travel Tractor ... how hard is that to stay in a straight line ... when I discovered 100 were missing.

I backtracked, to find the teacher taking pictures by the water wheel, in the complete opposite direction of our required travel.  They were worse than a herd of cattle to corral.  Pay ATTENTION people!!!  Most even have maps and time schedules and STILL don't know where to go.

Once I hit the store, I'll be back on the couch.  I would probably try to squeeze by, but Jonathan's supply of fresh veggies has run out completely.  I can breathe really well now and am hardly coughing at all.  It's all down to how strong do I feel.  Since I was able to vacuum the house after three weeks (good grief ... where does all that dirt come from????), I'm thinking I'm on the mend.  YAY FOR ME!!!!!

A Pin Point Of Light!!

Sleeping when you've got the creeping crud is an endeavor in futility.  Go to bed ... get some rest ... yet when you lay down, the explosion in your head and wracking cough in your chest bring you right back to upright.  I keep this sign plugged in just in case the end is imminent, I'll know where the cemetery is!!

Finding something to eat has become an interesting proposition too.  I haven't been to get groceries in two weeks.  I'm down to just a few choices now .... canned chili, pumpkin bread and three frozen chicken breasts.  With my head so full of gunk, it's hard to contemplate how to combine these three into something edible!!

In an act of sheer boredom, I plugged in my latest scary front porch feature, the flying ghosts.  At least it kept Cooper distracted from the ball for fifteen minutes.

Speaking of which ... as I sat in my sewing chair with my head on the table, just to have a different view for a change, Cooper found a raggedy ball to play with.  This is his latest and greatest game.  Guess where the ball is!!  He dropped it in the corner of my scrap box.  I dig it out and toss it across the room, he deposits it back in the box and waits.  Why do I get the weird animals???

The good news is I actually did get a few hours sleep last night in spite of the bombs bursting in the air all around us.  I've no idea what that was about ... something akin to M-80's going off several blocks away.  You might be a redneck if you're firing off this stuff three months after the fourth of July.  Or maybe it was the local SWAT team.  Who knows!!

This morning I can actually take a deep breath without coughing.  Not several in a row, but at least one is a start towards the pin point of light at the end of the tunnel.  In spite of my need for food, I'm determined not to go anywhere but the couch for the entire day.  I think I spotted a package of Ritz Crackers in the freezer which should hold me over until tomorrow.

I will be ......... as previously .......... on the couch!!

It's Groundhog Day!!

Like a broken record going over and over again ... I'm still sick.  Every morning I wake up just as sick as the day before.  Apparently the pills aren't of the same miracle quality as the Doctor's visit.

I can't breathe through my nose, my head feels permanently plugged up and I'm waking up the dead with my coughing.  For even more fun and enjoyment, a huge thunderstorm came through keeping me up half the night.  That's not even counting the upset stomach I got from the combination of horse pills and cough medicine.

I'll be on the couch ......... again!!

Nothing Short Of A Miracle!!

Okay, I've had about enough of this sick stuff.  My voice finally gave out in class two of four yesterday.  That's when you meet the most wonderful people in the world.  Stephanie, our office gal, had her husband go to Walmart and get some cough syrup for me.  I've always been a do-it-yourself gal, so when someone does something that nice, it melts my heart.

Teachers are another lot in the same group.  Not ALL teachers mind you, since I've seen some questionable examples in the last two weeks along with those 3,000 kids (and only 3,000 to go ... whoopee!!).  There was one yesterday who was amazing.  She kept her class interested, listening, involved and thrilled to plant two seeds in a cup.  I'm here to tell you, that's talent and nothing short of a miracle!!

That same teacher gave me two cough drops ... says she needs them all the time ... and I was able to finish the last class before dragging my sick bottom to the car and driving home.  I laid on the couch for two hours.  That's when the SECOND miracle happened!!

I called "Uncle" and at 2:45 called the Doctor.  They had a 3:00 appointment.  Once I finally got past the new check-in procedure with an orange computer ... hard to do when you can't concentrate on anything ... I was ushered in to a room.  Wow ... that was fast!  At 3:05 the Doctor came in.  Wait ... am I in the wrong office ... is this the accounting firm???

Twenty minutes later I was out the door with a prescription electronically called in to CVS Target.  After my last $175 Walgreens disaster, I decided to change pharmacies.  I expected at least an hours wait while they transferred everything over.  

It was an absolute miracle!!  I walked in the door, gave the kid my name and he stated my prescription was ready.  Couldn't be I thought ... it's only been maybe 10 minutes.  Sure enough, my $38 prescription was handed to me and I was out the door.  I was in total shock!!

In an amazing 65 minutes, I saw a doctor, had a prescription and was back home.  Can you believe it????  The planets must be aligned perfectly and someone was looking down on me with favor.  

So ... sinusitis and bronchitis ... rampant in all the schools ... if I take these horse pills, I'll feel like a new women in 48 hours.  Only 36 to go and I feel better already.  Although I'm tempted to go to "work" today, my voice has not yet returned.  I'll spend another day on the couch and be back on Friday.  I'm not about to let sick little kids get me down.  

What I WOULD like to do is whack their parents for letting them go to school coughing and sneezing, but then again, I'm sure babysitting is a problem.  We're not talking the richest part of California here ... this is small town rural countryside where there's lot of scraping going on just to get by.  

I'll be on the couch .....................................

Back In Time

Yup ..... still sick.  I wish I could go back in time on the Time Travel Tractor and squish the little kid that gave me this yucky stuff.  Just kidding of course!!

I had good intentions of leaving really early yesterday and crashing on the couch, but it didn't happen.  One tractor driver didn't show up.   The roads were so bumpy, the trailers people ride in were banging so much they were getting a little scared.  So the REAL tractor driver spent the morning fixing the roads while I drove.

I tried to get a couple of quick pics of the scenery so you have an idea of what's here.  Although they look kind of small in the pictures, these are all life-size dinosaurs, 20-60 feet tall.  I think there are about 25 or so, though I've never counted.  From pterodactyls to T-Rex, they make the kids scream with delight.  Ok, maybe a couple scream from fright.  The saber-toothed tiger is one of the best!!

So I gave my seed classes four times to small groups and drove tractor, before heading home and collapsing on the couch.  With the deep chest cough coming on, I drank hot honey lemon water until my eyes were yellow and I attracted a hive of bees.  

I have another three small classes today, then I'm coming home BEFORE noon.  It would probably help if I could get to town for some groceries and cough medicine, but that's not happening.  I'm looking forward to an afternoon of sleep, glorious sleep!!

Well RATS!!

I'm beginning to sound like a broken record.

I'm sick.

I made it to the Pumpkin Patch, thinking there was only 12 students.

12 turned into 125.

Totally exhausted, I went home at noon.  By 5:00 I was feeling pretty good

as I never moved from the couch.

Yay!!  I'm getting better.

NOT

Although I'm not coughing so much, I'm still very tired.

Three small classes this morning and I'll be back on the couch.

Hope to have something more interesting to write about soon!!!

OK ..... I'm SICK!!!

The long and short of it .....

I'm sick.

Those little critters whose parents send them to school when 

they should really stay home, got to me.

It's kind of a bronchitis thing

that makes me cough and sniff a LOT!!

I have 12 kids for seed planting

then I'm coming back home. 

It's day three ...

I imagine I have several more to go!!

So far none of my self-medicating is working.

UGH!!!

It Was BOUND To Happen!!

Good Morning Kids ... welcome to .......... oh wait, I actually have a day off.  It's a good thing, because (as I KNEW would happen) the little buggers have given me some kind of sickness that will probably be the death of me.  Yesterday consisted of coughing fits, all of which originate in my chest.  

Unable to get in to a doctor, I'm self-medicating (not really, just benadryl and advil).  Since it's viral, there's probably nothing they can do anyway.  Hopefully it's a combination of dust and smoke from the last three days.  It was BOUND to happen!!

This was BOUND to happen too .. I'm surprised it took this long.  I know you don't believe me when I say I can't cook, so here's the proof.  Anyone care to guess what these once were?  They were supposed to be little take-along snacks I could stash in the fridge at the pumpkin patch.  I cooked these brussell sprouts just a tad bit too long.

My oven needs fixing ... when I set it for 350, it barely reaches 250 according to the little temperature gauge inside.  So I set them at 450.  Unfortunately I got a little distracted making the bed and cleaning my bedroom.  At the exact instant I remembered, the house alarms went off in every room.

With sirens screaming, I grabbed the pan and raced outside, thankful they didn't burst into flames.  Next, I turned on all the fans in the house.  Luckily the sirens ceased in about a minute.  I should have just stayed on the couch.

As you can imagine, my house doesn't smell old any more, like when I'm gone.  Now it has the sweet smell of burned cabbage.  I turned on every candle device and plopped myself on the couch.  It was going to be a LONG day!!

Later in the afternoon, I kept looking at that box of rice krispies, trying to decide if I wanted to tempt fate.  Well yes, I did ... so I whipped up a batch, then dipped them in chocolate for added calories.  I can say they are very tasty, but really, I should have left the chocolate off.  At least I didn't burn the marshmallows, so I feel a little vindicated.

It's going to be another couch day, which isn't too bad since the Cubs are playing the Dodgers.  Being a Giants fan you KNOW I'm rooting for the Cubs.  So I'll be here .... napping in between coughing spasms.  How exciting!!  Hopefully if I DO have any seed planting classes tomorrow, they will be short and I can return home quickly.  I sure don't want this crappy stuff to get the best of me!!

The Things Kids Say

Okay, I'll admit it.  I'm REAL tired this morning.  See the nice, calm, quiet, empty yard?  It didn't last long at all.  Three schools bussed in 600 kids at 8:30 am.  It was a madhouse!!

I caught two parents trying to sneak in without paying the required $5.  They all like to come with their kids on the field trip and get in free, ride all the rides, then go home.  For their $5, they get $5 worth of food or $5 off any pumpkin.  Teachers are free ... parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and those extra four kids have to pay.  I even caught one lady trying to sneak around to the bathrooms to enter, saying she had already paid ... but she couldn't produce the required wrist band.

After helping get all the classes going SOMEWHERE, three classes at a time went to the Learning Center.  That meant three classes at a time ended up at Seed Planting.

Honestly, I'm not sure why the schools schedule this for such a young class, but undaunted, I began my little spiel.  In no time at all I discovered not a single student spoke English.  Well THIS is going to be fun!!  With lots of parent and teacher help, we finished in record time.  NEXT!!!

Another 50 kids came in and we did it again.  In the end, when I asked for questions, there was one boy who kept looking at the two calves right behind our group.  HOW DO THOSE COWS HAVE BABIES?  The teachers rolled their eyes.  I looked straight at him and said I didn't know.  The cows were all taken care of by Farmer Scott.  All I knew was how to plant seeds and grow corn.  Thank you children ... the exit is to your left!!

A little later while manning the Snack Bar, a five year old little girl came up and peaked over the counter.  "I'm hungry!"  I'm sorry honey, you should ask your teacher for something to eat.  "I want a cookie."  I'd love to give you a cookie, but they cost $3.00.  "I WANT A COOKIE!"  I can't give you one for free, you have to ask your teacher.  "WHY NOT?"  Because they cost money.  If you had some cookies, would you give them all away for free?  "No .... (almost a tear ... she was using her best moves)."  Well that's why WE can't give them all away for free.  I think I hear your teacher calling .........

I never realized you have to think so quick around these little guys.  For the most part, they have been very good at following directions, except for the "quiet please" part.  I did have to get after a couple who wandered over to the gold mining section, NOT included in any school schedule.  They started splashing water on each other and pretended to be deaf when I said to stop.  Pretty soon, there were 25 kids with their hands in the dirty water looking for GOLD!  "Sorry, this is just for looks ... there's no gold here" did not deter them one bit.   

It was a pretty crazy afternoon as all the kids left and the families began to come in for Movie Night.  Hocus Pocus was being shown on the outdoor screen.  In no time the snack bar went through twenty packages of hot dogs and a load of nachos.  As the sun set, it was time for me to bug out.  

I'm looking forward to a full day on my couch with the puppies and my wonderful bottle of Advil!!  

Goat Kisses

With the smoke finally gone, it was a beautiful day at the Pumpkin Patch.  The sunflowers they planted are blooming beautifully all around the yard.

I get to spend quite a bit of time every day with the goats, getting lots of kisses.  Last night they played King Of The Mountain as they butted each other off the top bale of hay.  Honestly, I think this is the biggest "kid" attraction out here.

I didn't notice these beauties until yesterday while driving the Dinosaur tractor.  We only had two schools, which was a good thing.  I have to give it up for the teacher ... when those kids got off the bus, she clapped her hands (never said a word), the kids clapped their hands, got in line, and were quiet as mice.  Weird, right?  

Later when I saw them taking a picture, she put her hands on top of her head.  Those ruffians snapped to, did the same, then all smiled for the picture.  Trouble was, every other second, they went absolutely crazy, screaming and yelling and NOT following orders.  Worst class I've ever seen.  I chased some out of the corn field, found three sneaking into dinosaur land and returned two more that tried to get on the bounce pillow when everyone else was leaving.  

By the time they left, I was exhausted, so I contemplated these nice quiet bees on a beautiful sunflower.

This is the same rowdy class of 50 I had to teach about planting seeds.  Luckily I got them just after arrival.  I clapped my hands like the teacher and they were quiet while I spoke.  I also now enlist the adults to help pass out cups and write names.  Makes my job SO much easier!!

It was a late night as one of our local schools held a "family night", providing a catered dinner.  I try really hard not to get special treatment in front of the working teenagers, but the Owner is always throwing me bags of Fritos or cookies.  Last night, he brought me a full plate from the catered dinner, which I couldn't eat because I was driving the tractor.  

Not wanting to make the paying customers wait, I placed it on the transmission beneath my feet and drove while trying to stab the salad with a fork.  Not exactly the best way to do it.  The food was delicious!!  Later, I saw the second catered group had roast beef!!  RATS!!  I got lasagne, but it was very good lasagne!

Today is a biggie ... I've got 110 for seed class and over 500 kids will arrive by 10:00 am.  I'm putting on my Patience Hat and zipping my mouth shut!!  It's also Movie Night at the Patch.  They are playing Hocus Pocus on the outdoor screen, so we'll be even MORE busy ... if that's possible!!  Keeping my fingers crossed ... after all, it's Friday the 13th!!