Raise Your Hand!!

Okay, how many people knew dinner wasn't going to go as planned?  Raise your hand!!  Don't feel bad, my hand is in the air too.  I just don't understand why I have such good luck at these endeavors.  With the ribs all seasoned and ready to go, I left them in the fridge to marinate for a few hours.  I had my timing down to a T.

Thirty minutes ahead of time, I went to plug in the smoker and what should I find?  No power in the normal patio socket.  I tried another outlet.  Still nothing.  I'm starting to panic now.  On the third try, I was lucky enough to hear the ding of success when the heating unit turned on.  I adjusted it to high and turned on the smoke to get things rolling.

That's when I remembered I was supposed to take the ribs out of the fridge to warm up a little.  I raced to the kitchen, snagged them from the cold box and even went to far as to place them on clean sheet pans which were room temperature.   The thought of using a hair dryer to warm them up crossed my mind, but they should be fine I said.  A few minutes later, I racked the ribs and placed them in the smoker.

The temperature wasn't quite what I thought it should be, so I turned it up as high as it would go.  In another thirty minutes, I checked the box temp, but it still wasn't up to par.  I know it's cold outside, in the 40's, but I didn't think it would make that much difference.  Well let me tell you, it did.  Finally I grabbed my laundry room rug and wrapped the smoker to help hold the heat and set up a wind break.  It worked ... but by now, I'm a little behind schedule.

Time to make dessert.  How could such a simple thing turn into a disaster?  I've made this so many times I have the recipe memorized!!  Apparently, it was also too cold INSIDE my house.  I do tend to keep the temperature in the mid 60's.  The chocolate mixed with the hot cream immediately seized up before I could fold in the whipped cream.  I had no choice but to WHIP the cream into the chocolate to get it to dissolve, in which case it became so thick, it was difficult to get into the glasses.

It's okay, I said, I'll just cover the messy top with whipped cream from a can ... Redi-Whip.  I put all the glasses in the fridge and proceeded to wash the utensils.  That's when I noticed THIS!!  WHAT???  The tip is missing!!  I'm SURE it wasn't missing when I folded in the cream ... or was it?  Oh good grief!  I really didn't relish telling the company to watch out for something chewy in the dessert, but I had no choice.  Luckily, he didn't get it.  Neither did I.  Something to look forward to in the next few days as I eat the remaining four glasses.  

Speaking of knives (more on that below), I handed him the wine bottle opener to pull the cork on the wine, whereupon he promptly picked up my favorite, sharpest, brand new knife and went to cutting on the glass and metal to get the label off.  I about had a heart attack.  I'm sure I looked distressed, but you'll be happy to know I kept quiet.  Be nice I told myself!!

Back to the ribs, I decided to forego the smoker for the last hour and stuck them all in the oven.  Too bad I didn't turn the heat up just a little more.  They were done, but definitely NOT fall off the bone.  I think they could have used at LEAST another hour.  Four just wasn't enough.  I didn't think they were TOO bad, but then again, I had two glasses of wine before dinner (he brought two bottles) and honestly, didn't care WHAT they tasted like.  

I was a good hostess, I cut off all the smaller ends and gave him those ... slightly thinner and more well done.  I think I need to practice my rib skills more often ... and NOT try to cook them in cold weather.  It really did make a HUGE difference!!  Who knew??

The best part of dinner was the baked potatoes.  I was a little concerned over those, not having baked potatoes in probably five or six years.  I thought the usual time was one hour, so I made sure they went in 90 minutes ahead of time.  Wrapped in foil, I kept turning them over and over.  It worked ... they were done to perfection!!  

Lastly, the cole slaw tried to throw me for a loop.  I wanted to put a little pineapple in .... just because. You know those little pull tabs to open the can?  It popped right off.  RATS!!  I tried a can opener, but the lid was too low and it wouldn't cut.  Company got out his handy dandy knife and opened it for me.  Of course no telling where that knife has been, but I CAN tell you it was inside a can of pineapple.  

I don't think I'll be having more company any time soon!!  If I do, Applebees sounds pretty good to me.

It's Magic Kingdom night, so I'm heading to the couch for a nap.  Yes it is only 7:39 am, but I need all the rest I can get when it comes to that group!!

NOT The Welder ....

I'm having a dinner guest.  It's not as exciting as it sounds however, since it's NOT the welder.  He had a wife that came out two seconds after I entered their carport.  Nor is it someone I've met (sigh).  Prince Charming doesn't seem to hang out in this part of the country.  Truthfully, I can't blame him.

When I'm gone, I have an old high school friend, a retired Police Officer, check on my house.  Every so often he has to drive all the way out when the alarm goes off, to find absolutely nothing wrong.  For this, I owe him SOMETHING.  His choice, smoked baby back ribs for dinner.

You and I both know he's taking his life in his hands to come and eat at my house.  Hopefully, if everything works out, he will be none the wiser.

Up early this morning, I was finally ... for the first time ever ... able to get that piece of whatever it is off the back of the ribs.  I read somewhere to use a spoon handle to get it started, then use a piece of paper towel to pull it free.  It worked like a charm!!

Next, I slathered them with plain old yellow mustard.  Slathered might be an exaggeration ... I covered them with enough so the dry rub would stick.    glb 34 yd ly snpt.  Sorry, I have one puppy on my lap and one on the chair behind me.  It's always cozy in the morning when I'm at the computer.  Back to the mustard ... it doesn't impart any flavor at all, but the vinegar does help just a tad in the tenderizing department.

Next up, a generous application of your favorite rub.  I make my own, adding a little more brown sugar than the recipe calls for.  There are dozens of recipes on-line, you just have to find one that sounds good and try it out.  Honestly, I've purchased lots of pre-made ones and have yet to like any of them.

After sitting in the fridge for six hours, they will go into the smoker for two.  Unlike pork roasts, ribs require a lot more attention.  Every so often I'll spray them with apple juice.  Like the mustard, it's not for flavor, but for moisture.  Then they come out, get wrapped in foil for another hour in the cooker ... or your oven if you wish.  

I hope my security guy appreciates all this work, because then they come out one more time, are unwrapped, sprayed and placed back with NO foil for one more hour, depending on the doneness at the time.  It's pretty close to rocket science, which is not my forte!!

Keep all your fingers and toes crossed that this all turns out well.  Baked potatoes and cole slaw will round out the meal.  If disaster happens, Kentucky Fried Chicken is about two miles away.  

Just a reminder ... it's the holidays.  That means single people all over are sitting home wondering where all their "friends" went.  Invite your single friends to lunch ... or to dinner ... or just to go shopping.  Maybe even stop by for absolutely no reason whatsoever.  You might actually invite them to Christmas dinner at your house.  It's hard enough being alone the rest of the year ... the holidays make everything MUCH more difficult.  

Next up, chocolate mousse ... the easiest recipe ever with amazing results!!  Twelve ounces of semi sweet chocolate chips in a food processor with one teaspoon vanilla and a pinch of salt.  Heat up one cup of whipping cream just to a boil and pour in the processor while it is running.  It's terribly loud, so cover your ears.  Let it cool.  Mix another two cups of cream with 1/4 cup sugar and beat into stiff peaks.  Fold in to the chocolate.  Done!!  

I drop it by spoonfuls into champagne glasses and refrigerate.  I've topped it off with cherry pie filling, whipped cream, raspberries ... just about anything you want.  I promise if you like chocolate, you'll be licking the glass.  Not exactly heart healthy, but champagne glasses don't hold very much.

Now to drag out the smoker and find a suitable replacement for the pan of water in the bottom.  I mistakenly thought the last one was an old rusty dog food bowl, which I promptly threw away.  AARRRHHHHH!!!

I'm A Quilter And A Zoodler

Being a quilter is kind of a misnomer.  I don't actually QUILT these myself, I take them to a wonderful lady who does that part for me.  I just sew all of the 5,000 pieces together.  I promise I won't make that mistake again.  Good heavens ... this quilt has gone on FOREVER!  Every single one of those white pieces is a separately cut and sewed piece.  Some of the colored ones have two pieces each!

I think I've been sewing on this for a total of two months, my usual time being maybe a week.  And I'm not done yet!!  I still have to spend a few hours moving squares around until I get the color combinations right, before I can finally stitch it all together.  By then, I'll hate it!!

The good news is that when the quilter is done with it, she does such an amazing job of adding dimension and design, that I will love it again.  At least if it ever gets that far!!

And now, thanks to the magic of Amazon.com, I've become a Zoodler.  I know this sounds crazy, but I've switched out a lot of the pasta I eat for zucchini noodles.  It's weird that this works and even more weird that I actually like them.  So far I've mixed them up (both raw and cooked) with parmesan cheese, with marinara sauce and with salad dressing.  They twirl on your fork just like pasta and trick your brain into thinking you're eating something delicious!!  It's really all in the sauce.

The magic machine even cores the squash, which is the weird thing sitting on the counter in front.  I've tried to cut out most of the carbs I eat ... which has been a lot ... and not only do I feel better, I'm full longer and I think I may have lost a couple of pounds.  Here's to zoodling, not to be confused with canoodling.  Unfortunately, I haven't figured out how to make mac 'n cheese with them yet.

I'm sure you're aware it's the time of year for returns.  Just for kicks, I googled those boots I've had for almost three years and what to my wondering eyes should appear?  They are still making them.  I ordered a pair post haste.  Now I have to go through all the trouble of returning them.  Yes, I should have known better.  They have the same problem, too tight in the arch.  At least I could get my foot in this pair, but then they were WAY too big!!  That's what I get for ordering boots on the internet.

THEN I found these beauties.  As I'm sure you already suspected, I'm not only addicted to quilting material, but cowboy boots.  These have to be very close to being my all time favorite fancy boots.  It just goes to show that sometimes, once in a blue moon, you CAN get boots on the internet ... and they fit!!  And they are taller.  And they are sparkly, which I swore I would never wear in a million years.  And they are MINE!!  My name is Nancy .... yada yada yada  ..... and I'm wearing them as I type.

To finish out the day, I made ... you guessed it ... peanut butter cookies.  I'm curious ... does anyone know why we mark the top with a fork?  These pretty much offset the zoodles, but it's better than having BOTH carbs.  

I'm contemplating where I can go today with my new fancy pants boots.  It's been VERY cold ... down to 32 degrees the last couple of nights, but I'll be toasty warm with my new boots on.  Hmmmm  maybe I should have bought a coat instead.

Spreading Good Cheer!!

Want to have the best day of the week?  Want to spread cheer among the masses?  Want to see some smiling faces?  Do I ever have a deal for you!!  You're going to be amazed, happy, surprised, gladdened and smiling from ear to ear.

No, it's not a free Starbucks card, and I understand completely if you don't want to participate because, you know, Starbucks is a big company that overcharges for coffee.  I do actually like that they take care of their employees trying to get through college however, at least around here.  But here's the thing ... you can pick another location.  Maybe another coffee shop or your local AM-PM.

Here's the plan.  You go into Starbucks and buy a $40 gift card (or however much your wallet can spare) and give it to the Drive-Up Window Cashier ... or just to the cashier, if there is no drive-up.  Tell them to pay for everyone's order until the money is gone.

The look of surprise and the big smile you will get from the cashier alone, is worth every penny.  In no time, the entire Starbucks crew will be involved.  They will be laughing, smiling and best of all, having a really good day at work when maybe it didn't start out that way.

It's all a secret though ... don't tell anyone who did the deed.  I stood just around the corner so I could watch the fun.  I think ten or twelve cars drove through, so depending on what they ordered, Starbucks wasn't that expensive after all.  

The smiles of the crew were nothing compared to the looks of shock and dismay on the faces at the drive-up window.  The cashier said she never had so much fun as when she was telling people their entire order was free.  Some crazy lady was paying for everything.  From the rattled mom with four kids screaming in the back seat to the older gentleman who said thank you and Merry Christmas six times, it made their day.  

Maybe that smile on their face will stay for awhile and infect ten more people.  Maybe when they get home they won't kick the dog.  MAYBE they will even pass along the gesture to other happy recipients.

Try it ... I promise it will put a big smile on YOUR face and a good feeling in your heart!!!  Spread a little good cheer this Christmas!!

My Name Was Trouble

Even from the time I was a tiny little munchkin, my first thought always went to eating!!  That's my shoe I'm having a taste of in the picture below, while parked on a blanket in the front yard.  You would think they wouldn't let me eat the soles, right?  As you can see, we did NOT have a picket fence ... we only had a picket GATE.  It and the fence were built high enough to keep most of the chickens (and me) in and the chicken-eating critters OUT.

When you pulled in our driveway, you drove across a dry creek bridge, then into our yard across from the gate where most of the farm equipment was kept ... a parking lot of sorts.  That's where I got into trouble.

Farm help was few and far between, but there were a couple of really nice old Indians who worked between the two ranches.  Since I have no recall of our number one employee's name, we'll call him Joe.  Joe had a penchant for the devil alcohol.  Sometimes we wouldn't see him for days.

On one such occasion, my dad finally got worried and set out to find him.  He didn't have to go far.  There at the bottom of the dry creek sat Joe's car.  Joe had apparently missed the bridge.  Dad got the biggest truck we had and pulled the car out, leaving it in our parking lot of sorts.  Joe was nowhere to be found.  Three days later, my Dad located him.  Apparently he had walked all the way back to his cabin to sleep off his affliction and the concussion when his head hit the steering wheel.  My name quickly became Trouble.

Being the inquisitive person I was at three years old, I wandered out to the car, opened the door and screamed bloody murder when I saw blood on the front seat.  For that, I got the biggest spanking ever!!  NEVER leave the yard, NEVER open a car door and NEVER scream like you just got bit by a snake!!  My parents put a lock on the gate.

That wasn't the first and certainly not the last swat on the butt!!  See the mountains in the back of the picture below?  They meander along right behind our little house, making for a great place to explore.  Cousin Billy ... six years older than me ... and friends Jimmy and George Nagle along with my brother, were always exploring the mountainside along the trails left by the cattle.   

One day my mother made the boys take me with them when they went out to play, which didn't make them very happy at all.  As we went on the great expedition to the top of the mountain, I was paying close attention to the trail so I wouldn't fall down.  Almost immediately, the boys did what boys will do ... they ran off and left me.  

Every square inch of mountain and land was used for grazing cattle, including the entire area behind the house.  Imagine my horror when I discovered the boys had disappeared!  I turned around to head back to the house and came face to face with a HUGE bull.  I immediately took refuge under a bush and was quiet as a mouse as I watched the bull nibble at the grass.  In a short while, he laid down and went to sleep.  OH NO!!!!  I'll NEVER get home again!!

Several hours later someone finally discovered I was missing.  They called out my name and woke me up ... like the bull, I had taken a quick nap!!  I suppose they were glad to see I was alive, but what the heck!!!  I was the one who got a BIG swat on the butt!!  What about the BOYS??  They're the ones who left me high and dry on the mountain!!  I tried to explain about the scary bull, to no avail.  It didn't pay to be a girl back in the day.

There were lots of adventures on the ranch, most of which resulted in a spanking for me.  My name was Trouble from day one and continued on for several years until I finally figured out how to get myself out of scrapes before I got caught.  It's amazing I survived!!

It's finally winter in California.  There's frost on the pumpkin this morning and it's a chilly 34 degrees.    Time to spread some Christmas cheer!!

I'm In-Between!!

I'm always stuck in between Thanksgiving and Christmas.  Getting ready to cook that big Thanksgiving turkey dinner is always fun and exciting, but once that's over and done with, I get stuck.  This probably says it all.

I seem to have a hard time getting into the swing of Christmas trees and decorations.  Not that I don't LIKE putting up all the decorations, because that's really fun, especially if you have people to help and to enjoy them.    

If I could leave the decorations up for a couple of months and someone would actually see them, I would probably feel a little better about the whole project.  Since I always leave the first of January to head down south, they all have to disappear right after Christmas when I'm trying to pack the rig.  Leaving all those decorations inside where someone might see them through the windows is definitely an invitation to break in.  The horseshoe Christmas tree will have to suffice.  

Always being on the road makes it difficult for other things too ... like eye appointments.  Last year when I called there was a three month wait, so I passed.  By now, I figured I needed glasses like you see on this puppy, so on my way back from Oregon, I made an appointment .... for 8:00 in the morning on Cyber Monday.  I didn't want to deal with a lot of sick people.  

I have to interject here that I finally went to the doctor to have my blood pressure checked.  SO MANY SICK PEOPLE!!  I went outside to fill out the paperwork.  When I was done, I took a seat inside in the farthest corner and kept my mouth and nose covered with my hands ... not that it would really help, but I did it anyway.  In ten short minutes, four other people had their mouths covered with their hands.  I had to laugh!!

Really, if you have a cold or the flue and are coughing and sneezing all over, PLEASE cancel that eye appointment and DON'T go to the grocery store.  I DON'T WANT TO GET SICK!!!  I come very close to locking myself in the house every winter so I don't catch the crud.  

At any rate, I got in early and lo and behold ... no change in prescription.  "But Doc, sometimes I can't see the guide on the television".  "You will never be able to see that distance clearly ... be happy you can see up close and far away".  Well okay then!!  I got another pair of glasses anyway, just because I have insurance that I never use.

Sadly, I returned the boots.  Seems they had been returned before for the same reason.  No biggie, I found an even BETTER pair that still had a 25% off Cyber Monday discount attached.  My Christmas present to myself.

With all my errands out of the way, I whipped up five dinners.  It didn't take me any longer than if I cooked one dinner, except for the rice.  I figured to take a shortcut and not use the big rice cooker.  The small pan should work just fine.  And it did!!  It worked it's magic and overflowed all over my stove before I knew what was happening.  I guess I was a little distracted cutting up the meat.  What a mess!!!

Never give up is my motto, so I added more water and threw it back on the stove.  I had no idea how long to cook it and suspected I'd have a gooey lump, but I pressed on.  In the end, the rice came out reasonably well, but it took me 30 minutes of scrubbing to get the pot clean.  I haven't even started on the stove.

I browned the meat quickly in a cast iron skillet, added lots of spices and spooned it over the rice along with some black beans.  Just for good measure, I parboiled some brussels sprouts to make me think I was getting more to eat.  I ate one dinner and put the rest in the freezer.  Yummy!!!

Next up ..... turkey meatballs and zucchini noodles .... if I can figure out how to use the new handy dandy magic Zoodle machine I got for $9.99.  I have 911 on speed dial.

GOT SOCKS??

Tall boots require tall socks.  Anything else immediately crashes to the bottom of the boot, ending up UNDER your heal, making for a very uncomfortable ride.  I was down to 1-1/2 pairs.  You get a half pair of socks when the inevitable hole appears making it rather drafty on your big toe.  I actually do have a couple pair in the rig, but in an effort to keep the equilibrium of "two of everything", I decided to hit Boot Barn and pick up some more.  Surely, since it's close to Christmas, they'll have some.

I know those holes are fixable.  I spent many a night in the closet at the ranch, with a lightbulb stuffed in the toe, stitching the holes closed for our entire household.  I don't know why that was MY job, or why I was relegated to the closet, but I DO know there were lots of cotton socks to be mended.  I also don't ever remember them being comfortable to wear with a big wad of repair just over the toe.

Merchandising is everything in the retail business.  If there is anything you want, chances are it's at the very back of the store.  That holds true for groceries, dog food and socks.  As I hit the store, I walked purposely towards the back, not looking either direction.  There's WAY too much fancy stuff with pretty high price tags that I don't want to take home.

Unfortunately, the entire boot section comes before socks.  Kind of like the alphabet ... b before s.  I already have plenty of boots, but TALL boots are very hard to come by.  These started calling my name immediately ... plus ... looky look .... no sharp pointy toes!!  After trying on six pair of boots and dragging two around the store, I finally discovered the socks in the far back corner.  I picked up five pair.

I walked around for another five minutes, just making sure I didn't miss something, before checking out.  The boots followed me home.

Just for giggles, I thought I would show you this pair.  Absolutely gorgeous in my book.  Too bad they don't fit.  I ordered these $300 boots three years ago ... I know, but if you want the pretty TALL ones, they are pricey.  The best pair of boots I ever bought were Tony Lama python skin.  I found them in Nevada almost 40 years ago and paid $350.  Boots were probably $50 back then.  They were like slippers and I still wear them, after all this time and after two sole replacements.  

At any rate, I ordered these boots, but they didn't come in before I left in the RV.  I called to tell them only to discover they had delivered them to my front porch.  I called my girlfriend, who picked them up and kept them six months until my return.  The sad part is I couldn't even get my foot halfway in the shaft.  Of course they wouldn't let me return them, so for three years they have been in the box on my back porch.  I finally had a friend who is a full size smaller, try them on.  She could barely get her foot down in the boot and we had a devil of a time getting it OFF.  Long story long, the girls at Boot Barn said to bring these in for stretching, just to see if it would make them wearable by SOMEONE.  

Now for the BAD news ... that pretty pair that followed me home have a little strap on the top.  See it in the picture?.  It's supposed to snap.  After ten minutes of trying to snap just one side, I took them off and threw them in the corner.  Back they will go today!!  Apparently I didn't need them after all!!  More bad news, I wore the first pair of socks last night and had a hole in the toe by the time I got home.  #%$#&*#@$#%  

The Magic Kingdom was just magical last night ... as much as possible anyway.  It started out really  S  L  O  W   and stayed that way all night.  I finally got smart and didn't have dinner at all so my stomach was happy.  The best news ever ... the infernal machine balanced to the PENNY!!  Everyone went home happy.  THE END.

For anyone wanting to make the Davenport Hotel Soft Peanut Brittle, here's the recipe

2 cups creamy peanut butter (put in double boiler over hot water to melt)

1-1/2 cups sugar

1-1/2 cups light corn syrup

1/4 cup water

2 tablespoons butter

2 cups peanuts, raw or roasted

1 teaspoon baking soda (dissolve in water)

1 teaspoon vanilla

Stir together sugar, corn syrup and water, cook over high heat to 275 degrees on a candy thermometer.  Lower heat to medium and add butter, stirring until melted.

Add peanuts slowly and stir like crazy for five minutes or so until candy starts turning to light brown color and reaches 300 degrees.  Remove from heat and stir in baking soda that has been dissolved in a teaspoon of water.  Add vanilla and stir.

Working quickly, FOLD in the melted peanut butter.  Pour at once onto well greased cookie sheet and spread as thin as you can.  Let cool completely, then break into whatever size pieces you want.  Enjoy!!

Jet Puffed!!

Anyone remember this container??  If memory serves me, there were lots of Jet-Puffed things when I was a kid ... not that we got any of them.  Cereal comes to mind first.  On the rare occasion that I was allowed to eat something from a box, it was Jet-Puffed breakfast at someone else's house.  We ate that horrible concoction called MUSH for breakfast.  Cooked oatmeal you could use to glue a chair to the wall.  Now you know where my cooking skills come from.

I don't remember exactly when this came around, but I DO remember getting a piece or two of Fantasy Fudge at Christmas.  There was a couple in town that lived in the Penthouse Suite of Hotel Tioga.  To this day, it amazes me that in this tiny town there was actually a hotel with an elevator.  Anyway, that couple figures in to the ranch story I'll tell you later on.

Mrs. Cooper was her name and she made Christmas Candy.  Boxes and boxes of candy she gave to her favorite families.  We would get all dressed up in our Sunday best, go to the hotel and walk right into the elevator where the Doorman used a key to take us to the top floor.  Once there, we were seated in the living room where we had homemade eggnog.  Mine of course with no booze in it.  An hour later, we left with our box of wonderful candy.  Pretty exciting for a little kid from the back forty.

Mrs. Cooper used marshmallow creme and made Fantasy Fudge.  That was over 60 years ago.  So yesterday, I decided to make a pan and give it away just like Mrs. Cooper.

The recipe is on the jar, but I had printed it out from the internet, just in case.  It's a good thing I did.  The printing on the jar was so terribly tiny I could barely read it.  I placed one cup of sugar in the pan, but that just didn't seem right.  I double checked the other recipe ... just because I know how it can go for me ... and sure enough, it was THREE cups of sugar.  

It's not hard to make, but requires lots of beating with a wooden spoon.  How long do you say?  Who knows ... I just kept at it until my arm was about to fall off, then I spread it in a pan and said a little prayer that it would set up and not be spoon fudge.  

In the meantime, I discovered why bakers use off-set spatulas.  They work perfectly to clean out the pan and deposit the leftovers in your mouth.  Boy this stuff is good!!!!

While that cooled on the table, I felt brave enough to try a completely new recipe.  If you've ever been to Washington State, they have a very famous hotel in Spokane called The Davenport.  It was and IS famous for being the epitome of splendor and world class hospitality.  From Charles Lindberg and Amelia Earhart to Carrie Underwood, many famous people have stayed there.   They are also known for their soft peanut brittle.  I tried some last year when I was up North and this stuff is amazing.  If you like peanut butter and keeping your teeth intact, this stuff is for you!!

Not the easiest candy I've made, it required lots of boiling.  Adding things to the boiling mixture resulted in hissing and foaming, giving me a good scare.  You have to work quickly, folding in molten peanut butter in the last step.  I poured it into a greased pan and held my breath.  As I used the spatula to clean the pan, the outcome was not good.  At one point I thought my mouth would be glued shut forever.  RATS!!!  I must have done something wrong.  

I waited for it to cool and tried to break off a piece.  It was solid as a rock.  I tried a knife, but that wouldn't cut it either.  Finally I picked it up and slammed it on the table, where it broke into several pieces.  Time for a taste test before I reach for the shovel.  MY OH MY!!  This stuff was DELICIOUS!!  It was soft yet crunchy, even flakey in texture.  I hit a home run!!!  I was so excited I did a little dance!!

Once in smaller pieces, it broke up rather easily as I packed it into little tins for Christmas thank you gifts.  I'm definitely making this again!!  

Next up divinity.  My grandmother made the best divinity EVER!  I've tried a couple of times, but mine always comes out spoon candy ... so soft, you have to eat it with a spoon.  I DO know you can't make it in damp weather, so I'll have to wait for the rain to leave, then I'm going to give it another shot.  Got your spoon handy just in case??

The High Desert

Back at the ranch under Lake Isabella, this is half of the church congregation, standing on the front lawn.  I'm not positive of the names, but I'll give it a shot.  On the left is Earl, one of my grandmothers four siblings ... the ones she never told us about.  Next is Aunt Grace, wife of my dad's bother.  Next up my dad and mom, then my dad's mother whom I never met and my dad's father who lived with us his entire life.  He's holding my brother.  I really have no idea who is on the far right.  Could possibly be my mom's mother holding me, but really I have no idea.

Our ranch was located in the high desert, full of snakes and critters that could hurt you, which is one reason we were never allowed to go beyond the fence.  We kept lots of chickens inside the yard as well as out, since they are really good snake detectors.  When we heard one cackling, us kids ran inside while the adults ran towards the chicken ... always with the same results.  Snake for dinner.

I know, it sounds horrible, but really, it tastes like chicken.  No joke!!  So this is me in the next picture on the right, dirty as usual, with my red headed cousin Patty on the left.  There was always a question as to where she came from since she had the reddest hair you ever saw!!  

There were actually two ranches ... one owned by my dad and one by his brother.  Although the houses were not close together, it was one big chunk of land cut in half.  Everyone worked on both ranches.  That's how it was back in the day.

If you look in the background, you can see bales of hay.  In about 1950-51, the two ranches (my Uncle Bill and my dad) bought a hay baler that was pulled behind horses.  It took days to bale hay, which I loved because we always took lunch to the men in the field.  It was the perfect place to crawl over the bales and fall on our heads.  

This is one of the few pictures I have of our lovely house.   We had electricity and a telephone that caused more trouble than it was worth.  It was the old antique hang-on-the-wall type you had to turn the handle to ring someone up.  Everyone in the valley was on the same line, and believe me, everyone listened in on everyone else's conversations.  Our ring was two longs and a short.  If you heard anything else, you were not supposed to pick up the phone, but everyone did with the excuse of "oh, I thought it was my ring".

The phone was the only news source in the Valley.  There was no television and no radio.  Sunday morning gossip consisted of what was overheard (and misinterpreted) on the telephone.  The only way to know who stayed out late or who was dating who, was to listen in.

Here's my brother Dennis and me, dressed in our Easter best.  We never got along, us kids.  He didn't want to be bothered with a kid sister when he had Cousin Billy at the other ranch to play with.  Remember I mentioned all the Bills?  It was rare that we were forced to stand side by side for a kodak moment.  I still have the old Kodak film camera my mother used for these pictures.

In those days men's clothing was found at the local gas station/hardware store.  Girls were out of luck, which is why I mostly wore men's clothing.  Whenever we went to church however, I was put in dresses made by my mom with an ancient sewing machine passed down from her mother.  I'm here to tell you nothing ever fit.  My dresses were either too small or too big.  That's how I became a Levi and Boots girl.  I wore all of my brother's hand-me-down clothes until I was in high school and started making my own.

More on the ranch later ..... GUESS WHAT I FOUND??  How weird is this?  One of my friends posted a picture on Facebook.  I sent the guy a message and asked if he made these and where he was located.  Yes ... he makes them ... about two miles from my house.  Can you believe it?  The cool thing is that everything comes off, so it's convertible to any season or design you wish.  

The bad news is he also makes other items out of horseshoes ... including a "not" inexpensive stand for six pairs of boots.  He's making it as I type.  In the meantime, I'm going to try and find someone to teach me welding.  Hobby number 59 coming up!!

Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner

I'm turning into a turkey.  I've eaten turkey for the last three days, breakfast, lunch and dinner.  Don't get me wrong, I LOVE turkey, but I'm getting rather tired of it.  I did freeze quite a bit, but made meals in those handy dandy containers from my personal chef.  I now have to eat two more days worth.  I'm trying not to be wasteful, but I'm sick of turkey.  Even a cup of gravy on top isn't helping.

We've had glorious rain the last two days and it continues today, so my trip to the Game Refuge was cancelled.  It's pretty far out in the boon tullies and I don't relish getting stuck anywhere my phone won't work.  Yes, I have four-wheel drive, but those levy's are narrow.  Tow trucks are expensive.  Don't ask how I know.

My little Cooper was looking pretty bedraggled, so rather than a bath, I gave him a haircut.  It's not his favorite activity, to be sure, but he stands very still ... like he's scared to death.  Once done, he knows he gets to play the ball game for ten minutes ... outside ... so the pieces land on the lawn and not on my floor.  He'll do anything to play the ball game.

While waiting for the football games, I cruised around the DirectTV menu to see what new shows were coming up.  Have you ever taken a really good look at what's on your dial?  There are lots of old 90's TV shows, but mostly rather interesting paid advertisements ... like "Women Over 40 Make Men Obsess".  Really?  What do I have to do?  The answer was spend a fortune on skin cream.  You'd be better off working on lessening the pull of gravity.

Then there were fascinating things like Real Housewives, which we know wasn't real at all.  It was scripted just like all the other "reality" shows.  Bar Rescue didn't flip my skirt, nor did Bad Grandpa, who takes his grandson on a trip to Las Vegas.  That one is sort of like Bad Santa, which was also on.

There's the best steam mop EVER, the even better SHARK Mop, "Do You Have A Turkey Neck?" (why yes I do, it's in the fridge), "Do You Poop Enough" (I'm not kidding, it was on TV) and at least five shows selling jewelry.  The one about how to make moonshine was interesting ... I'm thinking that might land you in jail ... and the best of the best ............................................wait for it ...........................................

WEEDIQUETTE.  Right there on your television, the etiquette of growing and smoking weed.  I imagine my mother said the same thing, but GOOD GRIEF!!  What is this world coming to????

I did find one thing I would like to recreate.  This is a perfect Christmas tree for my kitchen.  I always wanted to be a welder and make critters out of junk.  Alas, the equipment is rather expensive and I've not a clue how to use it.  I did a little welding with my dad, but that was WAY too long ago.  If anyone knows where I might have this made, let me know.  Or maybe I'll run into someone in Arizona who can teach me how to weld things and not catch my house on fire.

For those that are going to Indio this Winter to the FMCA rally, THE ICE CREAM HAS BEEN ORDERED.  We have a new manager from Wyoming who says he'll be the permanent Boss from now on.  I'll believe it when I see it.  The "Boss" has changed every year I've been doing this!!  I also spoke with Larry, our delivery guy.  I have his personal phone number so I can harass him mercilessly to make sure he gets there on time!!

By the way, it wasn't very nice of me to speak badly of the dead ... meaning the infamous Castro of Cuba.  I should have wished him peace ... instead I will wish him the same kindness he bestowed on his people.  Does anyone know who will be taking his place?

The rain continues, as does the crazy realm of television shows I'll be watching today. You probably know what I'm having for breakfast, lunch and dinner.  Maybe I'll make a quick run to McDonalds.

Bag O Turkey

Some people only get to have ONE Thanksgiving Day.  Lucky me, this year I got to have TWO turkey days.  How cool is that?  As with a lot of families, everyone can't get to the appointed destination at the same time, so this family has turkey day on Friday.  They come from as far away as San Francisco and Las Vegas on Thursday so traffic isn't a problem.

This is one of my besties ... Diane on the right and her daughter Shelbi on the left.  Diane and I worked together at the County offices for about eleven years and her daughter Shel lived with me for a couple of years after a divorce.  Later on, I found out Diane's sister and I were friends in High School.  It's a small world.  These two are the best and would give you the shirt off their backs if you needed it.  The feeling is mutual!!

Diane and I have a lot in common when it comes to the kitchen.  She outdid herself this time with the turkey.  She stuffed an 18 pound bruiser into a large plastic cooking bag and came up with a mighty tasty, juicy, bag O turkey.  I had a faint recollection of these from the old days.   I'm buying a box of bags.  It certainly would have made MY turkey more tender and delicious.

I was a little concerned when I saw eight potatoes in the pot to feed ten people (there are two adults sitting at the children's table out of sight in the kitchen).  Even more worried when she boiled them whole.  It was okay though, while waiting, we drank up two bottles of wine they brought from their trip to Germany to visit her son in the military.  

Although she read the box, six cups of water went into the pan for stuffing, the Stovetop variety.  That's when I jumped in with my eyeglasses and reduced it to three.  Next came the gravy.  She had two packets, to be mixed with plain water.  Since she had probably eight cups of juice in the turkey bag, I suggested we use that instead.  That was news to Diane.  

It took a little doing to get the heavy bag lifted up and a hole poked in the end.  Don't worry about all that juice that went on the floor.  Her two poodles will lick that up in a snap!!  I showed her how to stir the mix into cold water, then into the boiling turkey broth, but I doubt she will remember after that third glass of wine.  All I could think of was my watery gravy, so I was extra careful to put enough slurry in to thicken it up.  It came out perfect!  I am redeemed!!

About that time, she remembered the green bean casserole and the rolls in the oven.  Finally, dinner was served and it was DELICIOUS!!  She threw on some cranberry sauce and cans of olives, which little Braden promptly stuffed on all his fingers.  Remember doing that when you were a kid??  In no time WE were stuffed to the gills.  

It was a great day with "family" and I couldn't be more thankful than to have good friends like these.  If you want to make someone's day, invite them to dinner on Thanksgiving and on Christmas and on any day in between.  Especially if that person is single.  There's nothing worse than sitting home by yourself during the holiday season.  

Needless to say, we all skipped Black Friday.  I'm sure there were enough others out there that we were not missed.  By the way, interestingly enough, Fidel Castro died on Black Friday.  Fitting, don't you think?  At least the BLACK part.  Does anyone else remember huddling around the television waiting for a bomb to hit California?  We had a slight leg up on the situation, as our neighbor's husband was on the ship stationed just off the Cuban coast.  Nevertheless, as a kid, I remember being pretty scared.

I'm off to the store to pick up candy makings for the holiday season.  I found three bags I can use for groceries.  I'm tying one around my neck so I won't forget to take it inside the store.

Happy Thanksgiving number two and remember to count your blessings!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

I hope you had the best day ever, eating everything in site and making yourself very uncomfortable in the process.  That's what happens on big holidays and yesterday was no exception.

In spite of the turkey's quest for ham, I cooked a turkey that started off looking something like this.  For the first time ever, I was totally unprepared for this epic project.  If company was coming, I might have had my act together.  With absolutely nothing in the fridge with which to make stuffing, I pretended he was a chicken and filled him up with lemons, and rosemary fresh picked from my garden.  

I did have one veggie in my cart ... butternut squash.  My plan was for squash/apple soup, but the rest of the requirements didn't make it home.  I'll bake the squash instead.  One of the worst ideas I've had in awhile.  It looks yummy, but after an hour was still hard as a rock.  That's when I remembered cutting it into smaller pieces for the soup ... it roasted in 30 minutes.  I pressed on.

In three hours the turkey was looking mighty good.  I stabbed him with the temperature gauge and to my surprise, he was DONE!!  Wrapped in foil, he sat on the counter while I tried to figure out the squash and got the potatoes boiling.  They say a watched pot will never boil, but turn your back for five seconds and it will pour out of the pot like a volcano ... all over your beautiful gas stove.  I'll clean that up later.  With the potatoes whipped up ... some of the best I've ever made ... I went for the gravy.  

I'm good at gravy, most of the time.  There's always that ONCE!!  It looked beautiful in the huge roasting pan.  The color was perfect ... not too pasty white ... and it tasted WONDERFUL!!  In spite of the flour and tablespoon of gravy mix, it didn't want to get thick.  I let it boil while STILL contemplating the squash.  I let it boil some more.    

In an effort to save the only vegetable I had, I cut off the round ends that were edible and left the thick portion on the pan.  Maybe I'll continue to roast it later (you know that isn't happening).  Back to the boiling gravy.  As I finally poured it into the bowl, I instantly knew it was too thin ... something akin to water.  RATS!!!  

I enjoyed my tasty meal of turkey and mashed potatoes with runny gravy.  It being Thanksgiving, I was definitely thankful I didn't have company other than the puppies, who don't care about the gravy.  I finally put it back in a pot, added a little more slurry and thickened it up nicely.  It will be perfect for my hot turkey sandwiches!!  

I decided to skip dessert, after all, I was SO full of turkey I waddled.  Maybe if I go for a walk I'll feel better.  Cooper insisted on going too, so I harnessed him up and we were off.  One mile and many Happy Thanksgivings hollered out to neighbors later, we arrived back at the house.  I need more exercise.  

I scrounged around and found my bike trainer, installed my triathlon bike ... you know, the one with the really tiny seat ... and climbed aboard.  Fifteen minutes later I couldn't feel my hands, but my butt was screaming!!  I got off just in time for the wave of nausea to hit full force.  Maybe I'll just sit on the couch instead.

With all that exercise, dessert didn't sound so bad after all.  I planned a dutch oven apple crisp for last week.  If I don't get it cooked, the ingredients will end up in the trash.  It really could have gone a little better.  I was blinded by my stomach pains.  I grabbed the third cup measure instead of the half for the sugar.  It's okay, I like it to be a little tart.  

Although the directions weren't very explicit, I got it all in a dish and in my small Breville Oven.  Forty minutes later, I could smell the nuts burning, which is why you're not seeing a picture of the entire pan.  I'm eating it anyway.  No dinner .... just apple crisp, smothered in whipped cream.  

The cream is part of an experiment to see how many servings I can get from one can for the often requested ice cream sundaes at the FMCA rally.  No really .... that's why I put so much on.  Plus it cancelled out the over toasty nuts.

I hope everyone had a wonderful day with their families.  We should be thankful every day of our lives, and you should be especially thankful you weren't invited to my house for Thanksgiving dinner.   Now for some hot turkey sandwiches!!!