It Was A Two Bagger

I tried to get to bed really early, since an early morning rising was called for.  The Elks RV Park was holding it's monthly $7 breakfast at the facility not far from my home.  The puppies weren't sure why we were going to bed when it was still light outside, but they complied.  I couldn't wait to wake THEM up in the morning.

As the alarm went off with something that sounded like Deaf Leopard, I hit the button just in time to be tackled with wet puppy kisses.  Yuck!!!  After my normal feeding-them-first duties, I noticed my hand was not too sore, but again swelling up.

It was a one bagger morning as the frozen peas took it down nicely.  Just before heading out the door, I put the brace back on.

What a perfect day for breakfast outside on the patio.  I was greeted by the usual crew already hard at work.  There's nothing like a fun morning cooking with these guys.  Not that I cook.  They pretty much know my skills, so I'm relegated to pouring orange juice and dishing up fresh fruit.

The best job I have is being the taste tester for the sausage.  We have quality control down to a science!!  I was pretty shocked to see two pans of leftover hash browns from Mother's Day, but was assured they had been frozen.  I stuffed them in the oven and sent up a little prayer that when I taste tested them, I didn't get sick.

At least these guys are respectful of a woman's taste and smell ... when the fumes of gas came wafting on the breeze, I asked them to check the ovens, one of which needed to be relit.  Amazingly, the potatoes came out fine.  Not that I ate any, I passed on those babies.  It was the Krusteaz pancakes I was after.

Definitely not on my diet, but boy howdy they are mighty tasty swimming in syrup.  Maybe it's the syrup, but tasty just the same.

After a big cleanup five hours later (making sure they threw out any remaining potatoes and the butter that was outdated by four months), I was home with a throbbing hand.  I got out a second bag of peas, making it a two bagger day, but what helped the most was this beauty ... caramel and pretzels .... be still my heart!!  I ate the whole thing and completely forgot about my hand!  

When dinner time came around, I wasn't in the least bit hungry.  Those pancakes stuck around for a long time.  The head of cauliflower in the fridge would not last long however, so I chopped it up to try out a new recipe.  

I mixed up panko bread crumbs with parmesan cheese and some spices to lay underneath the pieces, then baked it for 20 minutes. The picture in the recipe didn't look anything like this.  In spite of the oil spread all over the paper, the cheese stuck to everything except the cauliflower.  

It might have tasted okay with a half cup of salt and pepper.  It hasn't hit the cemetery YET, but it's VERY close.  Don't try this one ... it's awful!

I spent the rest of the night on the couch watching baseball with my hand perched on the back of the couch.  Nurse Patty said I need to keep it above my heart.  Apparently it worked, because this morning it doesn't hurt and I can actually type!!  I really need it to heal up so I can install my new mailbox.

With my friend coming from Sacramento tonight, I really need to vacuum and clean house.  I DO however, have the perfect excuse ... my poor hand is in a brace.  I knew it would come in handy!!

If It's Not Broken, Don't Fix It .....

A little rain must fall into everyone's life.  Thankfully what's fallen into my life hasn't been TOO traumatic!  The other saying, if it's not broken don't fix it, doesn't quite apply.  Lucky for me, it's not broken according to the x-rays.

I really do try to be careful, knowing I can be a klutz now and again.  A couple days ago I was playing with Cooper on the floor when out of the blue, I whacked the back of my hand on the sharpest corner of the coffee table.  OUCH!!!

It put me flat on the floor for quite some time before the pain subsided enough to sit up.  I gingerly moved my fingers.  It must be okay since they wiggled nicely.  Unfortunately, the more I wiggled them, the worse it got until two days later it was swelled up and painful all day long.

My magic bag of frozen peas worked for awhile, but the pain kept returning, especially when I was sewing the binding on the quilt.  Maybe I DID break something.  In the end, it's just badly bruised at the same spot full of arthritis from when the horse bucked me off.

This lovely splint will keep me from moving it most of the day, which will give it time to heal up.  So much for hand sewing for awhile, which is okay, since the binding for the next two quilts has disappeared.

This does not bode well for my AA personality that has to be moving and doing all the time.  Maybe I can still cook.  I put a plastic bag on my hand and poked my fingers through.  Perfect!!  I picked up these spare ribs the other day (only because they were out of baby backs) to test in my Instant Pot.

Several people have tried this recipe and say it's wonderful.  So here goes!  Seasoned up, they go into the pot in one big piece with a cup of beef broth in the bottom.  Twenty five minutes later, they were done, although I did a slow release of pressure for ten minutes before opening the pot.

They were fall off the bone tender.  Cut in half and placed on foil to keep cleanup to a minimum, I smothered them in sauce and broiled for ten minutes more.  They came out amazing, or at least they LOOKED amazing.

As I picked up a piece, the meat just feel off the bone.  I would love to say they were delicious.  The spice rub I used was not my own, so the flavor wasn't up to par.  I slathered on more sauce.  Not bad, but nothing like ribs smoked outside, or even barbecued outside on a grill.  Although good in a pinch, this recipe probably won't be repeated unless I find some baby back ribs.

So ..... now that I know the way around my brace is a plastic bag, I'm off to the Elks RV Park to help cook breakfast ... pancakes, sausage, eggs, fruit and whatever else they come up with.  Maybe I can bring something home so I don't have to cook again this weekend.  

98 Year Old Memories

I think I've spoken about Apache Frank (Red Feather) before.  He's a five foot tall 135 pound World War II veteran who showed up at the VFW and was adopted by our Elks Lodge.  Prince Charming from the Magic Kingdom makes sure he's taken care of and pays all his dues, since his income is ridiculously small ... inflation and all that, I suppose.

Born in Mexico, his family came to the U.S. to escape the Indian Wars.  He lived in and around Fort Huachuca, doing odd jobs like feeding the calvary's horses until he turned 17.  That's when he joined the Army and was sent to New Guinea and the Solomon Islands.

You never see Frank without an Indian headband underneath his ball cap and a big smile on his face.  His favorite drink is Corona, of course, and his favorite saying Ya Te Hey, a Navajo greeting meaning it is well, can be heard clear across the room.

Over the last year or so, we discovered he was wounded several times, but never received his Purple Heart.  Since he joins us every Tuesday night, we have been picking his brain for information.

It seems while on his way to New Guinea, he was sidetracked in Pearl Harbor.  They stuck him on one of those big guns and he proceeded to shoot planes from the sky.   About that time he received his draft notice in the mail, thus some of his history was lost to the Army.

As we sat at the table talking, he recounted battles and the men who commanded them, along with specific dates, which we were able to corroborate instantly by checking on the internet.  Every single name and date was correct.  Amazing that someone 98 years old could remember all that stuff!!  

He did whatever he was told to do, from being a tail gunner (having never flown in an airplane before) to being a boat captain in the Amphibian Fleet (no experience whatsoever).  There was plenty of hand to hand combat in between, where he received several bayonet wounds.  Lots of it he didn't really want to remember, so we skipped around that part.

His brother was with Ira Hayes on Iwo Jima when they raised the flag in the iconic picture, but was soon killed in action over the next few days.

In the end, we hope he will get a trip to Washington DC in order to receive his Purple Heart.  At least that's what we are shooting for.  By the way, he is also a part of the Veterans Military Funeral organization (made up of mostly Elks members) and he plays taps at every funeral ... on his trumpet.  He's an amazing guy!!

Drop One, Pick Up Four

Sounds like my knitting, right?  I have the same addiction to yarn as I do fabric.  I can crochet anything, but all the good patterns are made for knitting.  I tried, believe me I did.  Barbara and Tom Westerfield tried to help me all the way to Bangor Maine and back.

Barbara is a pro who can whip out a beautiful sweater in the two hours it takes them to go down the road in their RV to the next stop.  Try as I might, I always had troubles.  I couldn't seem to count right and I was always dropping stitches.  Tom would ask how I was doing and I would lament my slowness.

The next day he would ask again, and I would have to admit I had ripped it out four times and started over.  I don't think I EVER finished a pattern.  Which is why I decided to stick with sewing quilts.  At least I don't have to rip those out quite as often!!

I'm pretty sure by the time I was done, there were fifteen quilts at Ann's house waiting for batting and her magic machine.  When she called to say come pick up four, I had one more to drop off, thanks to you readers for finding my mistakes.

Here's the first one you may remember from when I was in Arizona.  Get your sunglasses out!!

Here's the backing for it.  Pretty wild and crazy, right?  I hand stitched the binding all day long to get this one done.

It's always fun to put something wild on the back of a quilt ... something unexpected when you turn it over.  This one hits the mark!!

Next up for binding, another one from Arizona.  It's the same pattern as the one above, just different colors.  I was having trouble finding backing when Ann suggested this one she had in her stash.  Now there's something I would NEVER have picked up.  Today I'll head to the store for binding material.  Somehow I used up two pieces I shouldn't have.  

The sky was particularly weird as I headed out to the Doctor yesterday.  The good news is that I'm still alive, a plus in my book.  Even better, my cholesterol is 156 ... much improved from the previous 300.  I have to give it up to the Nutrisystem diet which I stayed on for four months after taking Lipitor for five.  

Basically, they take away most all the fat and carbs, leaving you with healthy meat and vegetables.  Boring for sure, but it seems to have worked, not to mention it's about $100 a month CHEAPER than me going to the grocery store.  

Unfortunately, I'm going to die of triglycerides, whatever those are.  More exercise he said.  Good grief, I thought when I got this close to the 70 year mark I could just sit back and enjoy life.  Exercise is too much like WORK!!

That's also when he asked about all these other tests.  Really?  You just said I was healthy and you want me to take more tests?  Is this a trick question?  Bone density, circulation, etc, etc.  I ran half and full marathons (13-26 miles) from the time I was 35 till I reached 62.  I'm pretty sure my circulation is good.  I'm all for preventative medicine, but let's check back in six months or a year.  

I guess I shouldn't eat those ribs I bought after all.  

Back To The Fair .....

Now that the dust has settled, I'll finish up the May Fair and being hijacked to work the quilt room.  It definitely made me appreciate my work a little more to see a few quilts where the seams didn't match up and the corners were cut off.  Sewing is easy, it's putting it together perfectly that's the hard part.

Here's another extremely difficult one to complete.  Look at all those tiny triangle-like pieces.  I would NEVER try to make this one!!

By now my feet were killing me, so I became a slacker on the job when I found an empty chair.  This one won the Christmas award.  It looks good enough to eat!!

When we were finally released, rather than hit the midway with all the screaming kids, we went through the Fine Arts building.  That's not usually where I pick to wander, but this oil painting made it all worth it.  There's no way a picture can show how amazingly real this painting is.  It totally looks like there is a kitty laying there ... definitely a 3D look.  I almost reached out to pet it.  

Time for the ooey gooey part of Fair time.  As I said before, I only go for the food, and this fair had the best concession I've ever seen.  THIS is a huge ice cream sandwich, filled to the brim with soft serve, dipped in chocolate and oreo cookie crumbs.  

Man oh man ..... that first bite was delicious!  There is both vanilla and chocolate soft serve between two thin six inch waffles.  For $9.50 it SHOULD have been good ... and it WAS!!  I ate the WHOLE THING!!

Of course no fair would be worth it's salt without barbecued turkey legs.  This is where I got the trip-tip sandwich.

By now it's time to go since all our time was spent inside the building.  My friends granddaughter was showing two sheep, so we stopped on the way out to say hello ... to the sheep that is.  

These were all 4-H animals ... lambs, pigs, chickens, bunnies ... the usual Fair fare.  Definitely fat as little piggies.  When I was in 4-H, I had a small baby heifer right off the Arizona rangeland.  My brother, who was in FFA by then (where girls were not allowed) had not one, but TWO huge beef steers.  

I got third place ... YAY for me ... except there were only TWO of us in the class.  No one told me heifers were not allowed.  Not that I had a choice in the matter.  My brothers big steers got Reserve Champion.  That's how it was way back when girls weren't allowed in a man's world.

The ride home was awful ... Friday night at 4:00 when I left.  The 2-1/2 hour drive took over 4 hours. When I got back, my gas tank was on empty.  I had just filled it with diesel for $3.85 a gallon.  My refill cost me $4.30 a gallon.  Funny how much difference a day makes!!

I'm off to have my blood pressure officially checked this morning.  It's important.  I just had a friend who did NOT check his blood pressure, end up in the hospital at death's door.  His was so high it killed his kidneys and he almost died.  Thanks to a friend of a friend (not even a relative) he had a transplant and survived.  Get your blood pressure checked!!!

Mini-Me STRIKES AGAIN!!

Well folks, just as I predicted, the mini-me debit card machine struck again!  I was happy it showed them I was telling the truth, but sad they still had not found the solution.

I trotted off to the Magic Kingdom early so as to have one tiny glass of fortification, meaning white zin wine, before stating my case before the Court Judge who knows all.  We didn't solve any world problems, but then we didn't care.

Soon I was off to set up the infernal machines.  I said a little prayer and opened the doors for business.  True to his word, the Judge came downstairs and sat on my shoulder during the first few transactions.  He just wanted to be sure I was doing it correctly.  I've no problem with that since we always follow the directions HE gave us.

In no time, out of four transactions, there were two that did not go through.  "Huh" he said.  Yeah, I've been telling you this for the past 12 months.  The new dedicated phone line didn't work.  He left to ponder that while we continued working.

An hour later, he came back again to discover six more bad transactions.  I explained every single one of them like he was a two-year old, just to be sure everyone understood the problem.  "Huh" he said again.

I was in seventh heaven ..... NOW he gets it.  It's not operator error and apparently changing the phone lines didn't work.  What now, Sherlock???  In the end, even with proof in front of him, I think the only reason he finally agreed something was wrong was because his wife dropped by after closing her flower shop.  Funny, she told him she was having the exact same problems with her machine.  To my amazement, HE BELIEVED HER!!!  No grilling or raking HER over the coals!!!

Now to close out.  He triumphantly informed us the upstairs bar closed out on the first try.  Yay for the upstairs bar!!  While he watched, I tried to close us out nine times.  Nothing.  By the tenth try, which didn't work either, he just turned around and walked away.  Ha!!!!!  Take that Court Judge.  I guess I won my case after all!!

Pizza and ice cream for everyone!!!  Not exactly, although once a month the Bingo crew DOES get pizza for dinner, and on this night, we were able to use our monthly allotment of Baskin Robbins ice cream we won at a donation auction/dinner.  It was a celebration!!

Feeling vindicated, we closed up shop and headed out the door.  No telling what will happen next time, as I won't be there.  Actually, at this point I'm not sure.  I am supposed to be going to a Golden Spike RV rally up North, but Miss Jessie is having bouts of sickness every couple of days, with Cooper joining in just for good measure.  I'm running out of paper towels and am not sure I want to deal with this while on the road.

Besides, how could I miss out on the Judge's next move?  I'll keep you posted!

There's More To The Story

I suppose I could have left this part OUT of the story, but the George Washington in me says I must confess.  In setting up the buffet table, the chafing dishes require something to keep them warm.  That means fire of some sort.

I should know better than to mess with fire, but there was no one else around and the fire had to be dealt with to get the water warm, which in turn keeps the food warm.  Enter twelve cans of sterno.

In getting the twelve cans to the table, I accidentally dropped one.  Of course the top popped off and ethanol gel went everywhere over the newly installed flooring.  Heavens to Betsy, I'm going to burn the building down.  I grabbed a handful of paper towels and began cleaning up the mess before anyone saw my boo boo.

So where do you dump a load of paper towels full of ethanol?  I had visions of our trash cans exploding in flames.  I stuffed it into an empty fruit can.  So far I haven't heard of any explosions.

I also haven't heard about the final resting place of the gravy.  They don't have a suitable cemetery in which to dump 15 gallons of ptomaine.  I'm certainly hoping they dumped it out and didn't try to salvage it like they did the leftover WAY overcooked sausage they plan on serving at the RV Park breakfast next Sunday.  Being cheap is fine for you, but NOT for the public!!!  No worries, I'm cooking at the park on Sunday and that sausage is going to disappear.

In the end, I was thanked with some roses.  They gave out almost 200 long stem beauties to all the Moms.  It was nice they dropped a few on me.  I was instructed to return the wine carafe they are resting in.

Totally exhausted Monday, I rested up, took some aspirin and slept an hour or so while watching TV. Then it was off to the grocery store since I was totally out of bird biscuits.   Like any little kid, Jonathan doesn't eat what he's supposed to, so I make bird biscuits with sweet potatoes and seeds.

If you ever make mini muffins for any reason, be sure and stop in at your local Michaels store and pick up some Wilton Cake Decorating pans.  These are the best I've ever used.  NOTHING sticks to them and these are a dream to wash.  Plus, they cook very evenly, so important to Jonathan.  Not really ......

Then it was off to my post office box to intercept the new backing fabric for my big Texas Star quilt.  The hand carved leather look fabric, $150 worth, isn't going to work out after all, mostly because it will NOT shrink, while the front of the quilt will.  I would end up with a boat on my bed.  I got the next best thing.  It's going to the quilter today.

My next stop was to return all of these sprinklers because they are the wrong size.  Of course they are because I had no clue there were different sizes of connections.  Alas, I was too tired.  This will happen another day.  

I did finally discover where my landscaping lights were again whacked in half, allowing no electricity  on one entire side of my house.  Don't worry, I'm setting up to ambush my gardener again.  THIS one, he is paying for!!!

I took a sleeping pill and crashed last night hoping to get some excellent sleep.  I did pretty good until the light crept through the windows telling Cooper it was 4:00 am.  I think I'll try for one more nap this afternoon because low and behold, it's the Magic Kingdom of Bingo night .... AGAIN!!!

They have guaranteed me that the debit machine will work.  I made them promise they would come and run it themselves if it did not, since they STILL think it's operator error.  Won't THEY be surprised when it doesn't work for them!!

Can You Spell Ptomaine??

We interrupt the May Fair to bring you news on the "incident" Sunday morning.  Bright eyed and bushy tailed, I headed off Saturday morning for Mothers Day prep in the kitchen of the Elks.  For whatever reason, the word didn't get out and volunteers were scarce.

That works fine for me since there aren't as many bodies getting in the way.  I immediately went to work panning sausage and biscuits for the big cook-off Sunday morning.  I think the men were still half asleep as they wandered around looking for coffee.

I wish I could get these at my house.  Bridgeford pre-baked biscuits are the best.  Eight minutes in the oven and you have a wonderful fluffy tasty morsel you can smother with butter or gravy.  Seven pans of sausage, eight pans of biscuits and ten pans of hash browns.

Everything comes frozen, so I filled this entire carrier from top to bottom, then wheeled it into the fridge to defrost during the night.  DONE!!  Next up, I cut and panned something like 400 small bites of coffee cake, a couple of which didn't quite make the pans.  Now THOSE were tasty!!  

As the men ran the slicer, we cut up four of the biggest hams you ever saw.  I stacked meat in five huge pans for baking in the morning.  Finally, and this is the weird part, the eggs come frozen in big bags.  Those needed to be thawed out for boiling Sunday morning.  Not only did we have scrambled eggs, we made seven pans of Denver omelet eggs, with peppers and ham.  Lastly, set up for gravy making Sunday morning.

This is where it all went wrong.  The gravy maker showed up and said we should make it Saturday, then just reheat Sunday.  I was skeptical, but who am I to question ANYONE about cooking.  He cooked up some sausage (I know not from whence it came), then asked for help pouring the mix in while he stirred.  No problem.  

See that really big pan on the right?  The 20 gallon one?  That's what he mixed it in.  The little one on the left got the leftovers.  We placed them on a cart and that's where they stayed as he left the building.  When I tried to get them moved into the walk-in fridge, the men told me NO ... they have to cool down first.  As I finally left two hours later, I reminded them over and over to PLEASE put the gravy in the fridge.

Skip to Sunday morning.  Fortified by half a maple donut, I watched as they brought the gravy out and handed the whisk to me.  Stir like crazy and don't let it burn.  Okie dokie, as I climbed up on my little stool so I could reach.  

I took one look at the big pot and knew we were in trouble BIG TIME!!  The grease on top wasn't flat as it should be ... it was pillowy and pouffy ... gassy to be exact.  No no no ..... this is NOT good.  I stirred the pots like crazy on low heat so as not to burn the bottom.  

Finally I leaned over for a big sniff of the big pot.  I have a pretty sensitive nose.  I can smell things other people cannot and I smelled something really spoiled ... worse than sour milk.  GUYS!!!  This has gone bad.  

That went over like a lead balloon.  They told me it was just the sausage grease.  No, no it's not.  I tasted the small pot and it was just fine.  There was no way I was tasting the big pot, just the smell had me swallowing hard to keep my stomach in place.  GUYS!!!!  This has spoiled!!!  You CANNOT serve this.

They kept telling me it would be fine.  Yeah, it will be just fine when we poison half the population of town.  I took a small bowl around to four other people in my quest to convince them.  Finally, the second in charge said maybe we should make another batch, it did smell funny.  He triumphantly announced to me this pot was scorched.  

There was no scorching hun, that's ptomaine!!!  For whatever reason, maybe they didn't put it in the fridge until too late in the day, but it was rotten ... spoiled ... and there was no way I was eating any of it.  He finally tapped me on the shoulder and asked where I got the gravy so he could make more.  Thank heavens he listened and made all fresh gravy in small batches at a time.  It was terribly lumpy, but who am I to complain!!  At least we weren't poisoning everyone.

I quickly moved to the ovens since no one seemed to be watching any of the food cooking there.  The men kept getting side tracked.  It's okay, THIS is the part I like to do.  I LOVE these ovens ... four regular and two warming.

One by one, all of those 39 pans of food were cooked and delivered to the buffet table.  Since I had one of the few pair of heavy duty oven gloves, I delivered most of them.  My shoulders are screaming at me this morning!! 

In no time, over 350 people went through the line.  Amazingly, I didn't burn a single thing, though a couple of those hash brown casseroles were a little over done, having sat in the warmer too long.  

At long last I turned the ovens off and began the cleanup process.  That part was pretty easy.  I just told the young cleaning/dishwashing crew to load up to-go boxes for themselves, and voila, all that food disappeared.

The last I saw as I walked out the door, was that big pot of spoiled gravy still sitting on the stove.  It was no longer my problem.  Once home, I crashed on the couch.  Two days of being on my feet for twelve hours was enough.  Time to recoup!!!

Hijacked!!

To all the Moms out there .......
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!!!

I didn't have time yesterday morning to show you Friday's adventure.  I was off to the Elks Lodge to prepare for Mother's Day breakfast.  Might I say the dirty 30 (thirty people do everything) has turned into the dirty FIVE.  I suppose everyone thinks there is plenty of help, so they are no shows.

At any rate, on Friday after a terrible 2-1/2 hour drive including the big fire, I arrived west of the town of Sacramento in the LITTLE town of Dixon.  They have a great May Fair, big enough to be fun, but small enough to be more personable.

This says it all.  Fair food!!  What could be better than something greasy, ooey and gooey.  I stayed away from the healthy stuff and went straight for the barbecued trip-tip sandwich.  I scarfed it down so fast I didn't even take a picture!!

My friend Cyndae and I then went to the quilt building to see the latest and greatest beauties hanging on the wall.  Strangely, I was met with "I'm so GLAD you volunteered"!!!   Ummm wait ... I didn't volunteer for anything.  I'm just here to take some pictures and eat greasy food.

Hijacked I tell you ... I was hijacked.  Little did I know my friend had volunteered us to work the building for three hours.  That means keeping the kids from touching things and being the meanies that make everyone with food stay outside.  

We were also charged with running the "vote for your favorite" contest.  I accosted everyone who entered the building.  

The entire time I walked around, I kept wandering closer and closer to the food competition tables.  I wish I had brought a big chunk of my banana bread.  This stuff was looking mighty delicious and my stomach was starting to grumble.

This little morsel in particular caught my eye and my camera.  The only thing that kept me at bay was the fact it had already been sitting there for two days.

The quilts were amazing and blinding, making me rub my eyes.  I don't think I could have this one in my house.  The colors are fabulous but I'd be buying new eyeglasses every couple of months.

This one won the grand champion award, along with the hand carved leather clock, bottom left.  I've done a lot of leatherwork in my lifetime (purses, belts, that kind of stuff) but I've never seen a class in any fair where you could enter and win a prize.  Pretty cool.

This was my all time favorite.  Not the feather lined hats, but the Cowboy Cats cross stitch.  I liked it so much I looked for it online.  It came with a $179 price tag ... and YOU complete it.  Yikes!!  By the way, I voted for my favorite quilts ... twice.  There were two and I couldn't decide.   Okay, truth be told, I voted for THREE.  Don't tell anyone.  

On the walk through the grounds on the way out, because time flies when you're guarding the quilts, I came across these three girls practicing their show moves with miniature goats.  The one on the left is in trouble.

There's more to go, but this story is being interrupted for Mother's Day.  Today I'll be mixing up egg casseroles, stirring up hash browns for baking and making nothing less than 15 gallons of gravy.  So far so good, the only thing I dropped was an entire can of sterno ... you know, the stuff you use in chafing dishes to create FIRE!!!!  I'll finish this story tomorrow!!

Short And Sweet

It was a REALLY long drive to the fair and even longer when I headed back.  The first traffic jam on Highway 120 was due to fire.  The entire freeway intersection of I-5 and 120 was engulfed in flames and smoke.  Unlike most states, California doesn't mow the medians.  Add to that 20-25 mph winds and someone throwing out a cigarette and this is what you get.

But my story will have to wait.  Very early this morning I'm headed down to the Magic Kingdom of Elks kitchen to prepare for tomorrow's Mothers Day breakfast.  I'm pretty sure they had NOT heard about my latest disaster in the kitchen when they asked me to make the gravy.

Truly, this is a MAN'S job.  Someone with more arm power than I have and preferably someone TALL.  I imagine I'll be standing on a chair the whole time.  At least this morning I'll see what I'm up against (and if I can talk someone else into doing it) while panning waffles, biscuits, egg casseroles, hash browns, sausage and ham.

The real test will be to see if I can get my act together and be there by 6:30 tomorrow morning!!!

A Marathon Of A Meeting

I finally got a great night's sleep in my bed!  That little trick of exercising in the morning seems to be working on my hip.  I ran just a tad over a mile, impressing the kids waiting for their school bus with my rapid speed of a really slow jog.  

I spent hours and hours running through a nearby neighborhood when I was training for marathons.  It's pretty boring, in spite of changing the route every day.  It hasn't gotten any better.  The bankrupt house on the next street over is still bankrupt and a mess on the outside ... I can't imagine what the inside looks like!

There are still 25 people in one house with 9 cars parked out front and the guy who had wood chips delivered in place of lawn, still hasn't leveled them out after six years.  No matter, if it helps keep my hips swiveling, I'm okay with boring.

This is me and my friend after a grueling 26.2 miler in Sacramento in 35 degree weather with a little rain thrown in for good luck.  Everyone else was throwing off their jackets (they are donated to the homeless) ... we picked up two along with some gloves to keep from freezing!!  I finished in the required six hours, then drove two hours home.  

At any rate, all that prepared me for the brick wall I was up against last night at the Elks Lodge meeting.  I was worried about bringing the subject up ... I mean really, these guys are not going into the future without being drug like a calf on the end of a rope at branding time.

I arrived in time for the 6:00 meeting, which turned into a 7:00 meeting, which turned into an 8:00 meeting while they went into closed session to discuss another problem.  

Prince Charming came to my rescue and approached the subject.  I then dumped all my failed tickets on them, recounted the fight and our current request for the return of $100 that was never taken.  I recounted my "no official capacity" story, but got slammed for "who are you to contact our company".  

I invited them to Tuesday night Bingo to run the debit card machine.  How funny, they declined.  Finally I discovered I had an ace in the hole (a trustee member) who recommended I look into it and test the waters.  YAY for my side!! 

The two in charge finally said they had convinced Comcast something was wrong (it's been over a year this has been happening) and it was discovered instead of 5 separate lines, we only had three with two "hunter" lines, meaning when a call goes over them, they "hunt" for an open line.  In turn, that means credit/debit card machines do not work.  No kidding!!!  Supposedly they fixed it yesterday.  We shall see come Tuesday night.

With one last kick in my side, the one who had been "working" on it said he HAD been working on it, just so I KNOW.  Yeah ... for over a year with no results.  I think he got wind last Tuesday I was going to raise cain at the Board meeting and figured he better do something quick.  

At any rate, it all ended well.  If the machine doesn't work Tuesday night, I am now OFFICIALLY authorized to talk to the company and get a wireless unit for Bingo.  SUCCESS!!!!!  

I'm off this morning for a marathon day at the May Fair west of Sacramento.  I'm not really looking forward to all that driving, even if I DID get some sleep, but promised my friend I would go since I have declined her offer five times previously.  No worries, if I get tired, I'll just pull over for a quick nap!!

Paddling Through Treacherous Waters

Having been given only 48 hours to come up with a solution to our mini-me infernal machine at the Magic Kingdom, I dove in head first.  After an appointment in town, I went to the nearest car wash.  Strange you might say, but there's a local business called Prime Shine Car Wash that uses all hand held devices to check you in and print out a receipt in record time.

Three car washes later, I couldn't find anyone who knew anything about it.  I headed home and hit the computer.  Do you have any idea how many companies and systems there are out there?  I'm at a distinct disadvantage since the Lodge also uses it for the bar and restaurant area, meaning I'm not familiar with the whole operation.

I was definitely swimming upstream when I decided to call and find out what company our current credit/debit card system was with.  I looked them up online and was instantly drowning in all the information.  I called the company and spoke to a very helpful tech support girl who said she would look up our account.

WAIT ..... I'm not calling in any kind of official capacity (at least I don't feel like I am) and the waters I'm treading in are very treacherous.  These guys have told me for over a year that they are working on it.  Imagine if I found a solution in 48 hours.  They will take away my life jacket and wave goodbye.

So here's what I found.  It's the upgraded version of what we have, but here's the good part.  It not only takes regular cards, but chip cards too and even does the tap-your-debit card thing.  Better yet, it's wireless.  She said it would work within 300 feet of our router.  No problemo!!

We need three.  The first one will be switched for free, the second two cost $400 each.  That sounds reasonable enough to keep me afloat.

So tonight I'll put my life on the line at the Board Meeting and see just how far I can swim under water.  I'll be holding my breath the entire time!!  There will be no life ring throwing ... it's sink or swim.

I thought this a good representation of what I should be.  Soft and fuzzy but with feet that can kill.  Just look at those claws?  This was one of several babies that needed fostering not long ago.  I'm going into zen mode and I'll be channelling baby barn owl tonight.

But first, I'm going to crash on the couch.  Miss Jessie was up sick all night long, not to mention my sciatic nerve was screaming at me.  I think I'll sit on an ice pack ... it will keep me cool until tonight.