It Was One Of Those Nights

 It was a head shaking night at the Magic Castle of Bingo.  I'm a little worse for wear this morning as I sip my wonderful fake coffee.  This may even be a three-cup morning.  It's definitely going to be a three aspirin morning!!

But first, today is the day.  I tried out the latest bread craze.  Patsy and Dave both have sung the praises of this new Keto low carb seeded bread.  I admit, I do love BREAD!  Especially hot and smothered in butter.  I can't believe I paid that much for one small loaf ... $7.59 in fact.  I imagine it's probably cheaper other places, but there's only one store here that carries it.

I will definitely cut it down to one piece per day.  It was rather dry, especially with just scrambled eggs ... more butter please!!  Yes, the little pile off to the left is Cooper's.  Mom doesn't get to eat ANYTHING without sharing ... but ONLY good for him stuff.  

I skipped lunch.  I was off to the Castle to sign checks and pick up budget stuff.  An hour later I tiptoed down to the dungeon.  First up ... a trip to the Outhouse.  There was NO paper.  Not TP nor paper towels.  I of course called the King, who said to talk to the staff.  

No problem they said ... we are taking care of it now.  No they weren't.  Thirty minutes later there was a clamor in the Castle outhouse.  With no staff to be seen, one of the girls and I would have to fill them up, but for the life of us we could not figure out how to get the container open.  It was pretty hilarious for two seconds.  Finally the King had to come and fix it.  It was an omen.

My Lady in Waiting was not going to partake in the festivities on this night, so I had to shanghai a peasant.  I found a willing body, but she had never done it before.  I was very wary, but she was the only one I could drag to the table.  We got everything set up and waited.  I heard crickets in the back pull tab room.  No one showed up to work that section.  Soon I heard crickets in the Bingo room also.  Where is everyone?

I trekked out to see if the moat was closed.  Nope ... the drawbridge was down.  Apparently none of the 20 peasants outside the door actually thought to pull on the handle and OPEN the door.  They flooded in and headed to the NEXT barrier.

It was chaos for twenty minutes because they can't come in until the back room is ready to go.  At last the Knights showed up to save the day.  We opened late to pitchforks and flaming torches ... a definite NO NO in Bingoland.

That's when the next big fiasco hit.  The lady picked her cards and used the mini infernal machine to pay. Declined.  We tried again.  Declined ... whereupon she threw her cards at me and said she would be back.  She was holding a red dobber.  

I looked down at the table and her cards to see red spots.  Someone said HER DOBBER IS LEAKING.  No ... no it wasn't.  I grabbed some tissues to clean it up, only to find out it was blood.  Of course everyone panicked. I stopped the entire show and sent my new girl Friday after the King.  He brought back lots of cleaning supplies while I washed my hands three times before spraying them with sanitizer.  Update:  Apparently she had a nose bleed and eventually came back an hour later, not saying a word to anyone.

Here's my dinner.  Though I went to the kitchen and ordered my normal chicken tenders ... no fries ... somehow the scullery maid with purple hair forgot to PLACE the order.  When I went back 30 minutes later there was nothing with my name on it.  Chips ... I ate Lays chips for dinner.

The next two hours were spent trying to go over the budget with a fellow Elk while selling bingo cards and paying out winnings.  I finally gave up.  There was just no way to concentrate.  At long last I cashed out the infernal machine and locked everything up.  A very big long sigh of relief could be heard throughout the dungeon.

And so this morning, recovery begins.  That involves lots of coffee ... and maybe some Cooper puppy snuggles to make it all better, followed by FOOD ... I NEED FOOD!!