In The Interest of Fair Advertising

I don't frequent fast food joints.  Although I love LOVE their food, I gain weight just looking at it.  I haven't had a craving for hamburgers in years when I stopped in at In-N-Out in Gilroy.  You already know how disappointing the french fries were.

So on my way home yesterday from purchasing material in Turlock, I had to drive by not one, but TWO Mickey D's.  Barbara Westerfield suggested I try THEIR fries.  Well why not???  Life's short.  So in the interest of fair advertising, here's my report.

I gobbled down the first one right out of the nice brown bag before I even left the parking lot.  WHAT A DIFFERENCE!  They were hot, crispy on the edges with just a hint of salt and completely cooked through like a french fry should be.  I could even tell they had been in a boiling bath of oil, giving them just the right texture.  They were half gone by the time I got home (it's about a mile away).

Here's why you get your french fries at McDonald's, but your burger at In-N-Out.  McDonald's has changed up their menu.  They used to have a large selection of delicious things, but alas, I only saw one chicken sandwich and about six burgers.  Chicken nuggets don't count.  Eating chicken parts I can't recognize is a dangerous health risk.  

Not wanting another burger, since they post all the calories on each and every one, I settled for the Artisan Chicken Sandwich.  Trust me folks, there is nothing "artisan" about it.  Maybe it's the bun that meets their criteria.  Yes, there really is a bun smashed to death under that tough piece of chicken.  The top bun didn't fair well either.  The best part was the not-quite-ripe tomatoe covered with a limp piece of lettuce.  

An Artisan is a skilled crafts worker who makes things by hand.  I suppose I have to admit it was thrown together by hand, including the teaspoon of something resembling sauce underneath the chicken.  I honestly couldn't taste it at all ... I tried .... before dumping two tablespoons of honey mustard into the middle.  It didn't help.

I'm on a quest now ... something like the bread pudding of the year award we were trying to drop on someone as the Westerfields and I crossed the United States to Maine.  I HAVE to find the best french fries.  I'll skip anything with the name Artisan.

My trip out of town yesterday was to pick up fabric to make a baby quilt.  I know ... there are no babies in my life, but it's the cutest thing EVER!!  My embroidery machine that I picked up in Tucson is the bees knees!!!    So sad for me, I didn't get QUITE enough material, so I'll have to return today, driving right by Carls Junior!!

Obviously the diet has gone out the window the last week or so, so I'm trying to get back on track with another Instant Pot wonder.  There are a million recipes out there ... many of which do NOT turn out well for others, so I decided to stick with a known formula.  Here's the first chicken cacciatore recipe I made.  It's a keeper, so I made it again last night.  Gosh darn ... this stuff is GOOD!!

I served it over a little bit of rice, in an actual ceramic BOWL.  I did learn a lesson here ... cut up chicken breast takes longer to cook than thighs, even though it's all the same size.  I'm sticking that piece of information in my brain in the hopes it will reappear the next time I cook chicken.

It's time to get organized and start packing for a rally in Sacramento coming up this week.  Not sure I'm going to use it, but the Instant Pot will go with me everywhere from now on, so I need to procure a place for it to ride.  Reorganization ... not my forte!!  Maybe I can find a Taco Bell in Old Town Sacramento to further my quest ... oh wait ... they don't have french fries!!

Robbers Pass

I haven't been taking my camera with me lately ... shame on me!!  I did remember it on my trip over the hill to Gilroy and Morgan Hill, but only after driving five miles down the road.  That's usually enough for me to say forget it ... but this time I went back.  California is gorgeous in the springtime.

As you drive up over the Diablo Mountains between the Santa Clara Valley and our Central Valley, you can see nothing but green.  In the olden days, back when I was a kid (not really), it was the site of a stage station on the Butterfield Overland stagecoach mail route.  It connected St. Louis Missouri with San Francisco and quickly became known as Robbers Pass.

On this particular day, the clouds looked like they were playing tic tac toe.  The Yokut Indians were the first to use this trail to traverse the mountains and trade with the coastal tribes.  It's a beautiful area, but unfortunately there aren't many turnouts where you can stop and enjoy the view.  In fact, there are none.  I stopped in a big driveway with no parking signs every ten feet.

It's more well known name of Pacheco Pass was for Francisco Pacheco who owned 35,000 acres of Mexican Land Grants, but people knew it as Robbers Pass because of all the holdups that took place there.   There was only one route over the hills in central California, so it was the perfect setup for bad guys looking to garner a few bucks without working for it.

Seems kind of weird, but on the Eastern side of the Diablo mountains there is a huge dam creating the San Luis Reservoir.  It's an artificial lake and stores water taken from the Sacramento River Delta.  Water comes from the California Aqueduct system, is pumped UPHILL into the lake, then is released back DOWN into the forebay where it continues on south for irrigation and "other purposes" meaning water for the Los Angeles area.  This is the first time it has been full in many years.

Although it is a recreation area for boaters and fishermen, it is notoriously windy and has caused many deaths from overturned boats.  I caught my biggest fish ever at this location.  

At any rate, on the way back I didn't see any robbers, but I did see lots of water in the San Luis Wildlife area.  Water from the San Joaquin River spreads out on this flood plain (that is when there IS water) as far as the eye can see, making it a perfect habitat for ducks and all water critters.

There's no place to stop along this highway either.  You would think they could widen the road a little, but apparently they don't want visitors.  I stopped by a bridge in a spot barely wide enough for my truck and left my flashers on just long enough to get this pictures of the ducks scurrying away.

As you get closer to the river proper, there is a large parking area, completely flooded.  If you're brave, you can tempt fate and try to cross over to it.  I didn't stay too long ... there were a couple of fishermen just a little too close for comfort. 

It really is a beautiful area, whether in the spring when everything is green, or in the summer when the hills look like velvet from the brown summer grass.  Take someone with you for pictures because you're going to want to keep your eyes on the road.  

This is a major truck corridor to the Bay Area, along with tons of people who are in a BIG hurry on a  narrow and steep highway, making it a rather dangerous ride.  I can't believe we rode Pacheco Pass on our motorcycles back in the old days and lived to tell the story.    Someone was definitely looking out for us on Robbers Pass.

French Fry FAIL

In the world of french fries, sometimes you win and sometimes you lose.  I was in a state of shock yesterday as I lost BIG TIME!!

In spite of my grogginess from the usual late night Magic Kingdom, I was determined to make the drive to Morgan Hill to see the Madonna Needlepoint store.  I've had these two canvases for quite some time, but no yarn to complete them.  Don't ask me why they are Japanese Kimonos ... I must have been going through an Oriental phase.

At any rate, the drive wasn't bad at all in spite of the terrible road over Pacheco Pass.  It's narrow with lots of concrete barriers and REALLY bumpy for a 3/4 ton truck since it's California and we haven't fixed our highways in ages.  Once over the hill, it reverts to a two lane narrow blood alley (lots of accidents there) until finally hitting Gilroy and Hwy 101.  A short five miles later, I was in Morgan Hill at a WONDERFUL store.

Why didn't I hear about this before?  The shop is HUGE with tons of canvases and even more thread of every color under the sun!!  I was so awestruck I forgot to take pictures.  The people were very nice and invited me to stay the day.  Instead, I purchased yarn to finish these two projects and signed up for a free Help Class on a Sunday morning.

Reason being ... this spectacular canvas I've had for maybe ten years and never completed.  She deserves some pretty crazy needle and bead work, not to mention that hair.  This instructor is the creative one who will help me make something fabulous.    And did I say her talents were FREE?

When it was finally time to head home, I stopped off in Gilroy at In-N-Out burger.  I rarely stop at fast food places ... now I know why.  At 1:00 the line was 15 cars long.  At least they had a guy out front taking orders, with the line moving along nicely.  I waited because I just KNEW how good those burgers and fries were.  

Finally at the window, I deposited my $6 and grabbed the food.  I parked under a nice shade tree in the parking lot to eat.  Hmmm the fries aren't as good as I remember.  I tasted another.  I must have been in dreamland four years ago when I ate my last In-N-Out fries because I distinctly remember loving them.  I tasted another.  Maybe some ketchup ... maybe LOTS of ketchup.  It didn't matter one whit!!  These fries were the worst I've ever eaten, and that's saying a LOT because occasionally I eat the ones at the Magic Kingdom!!

Totally inedible.  They were so dry even six bags of ketchup didn't help.  Mealy, tasteless, horrible french fries.  They went in the trash.  I don't know if they have changed their way of prep or maybe they were undercooked due to the number of customers, but I seriously don't think these fries ever hit hot oil or ANY oil.  They totally looked like they were air fried.  No wonder the guy gave me so many bags of ketchup.

As I tried to figure out where the nearest garbage can was, I ran across this guy.  What in the world?  The front tires are almost off the ground.  I didn't see any tie-downs at all.  It looked like the camper was just sitting on the back part of the bed.  That can't be good!!  Notice the propane tank strapped down right in the back so when hit by a car, it will explode nicely into flames.  I can't believe they haven't been stopped.  It just doesn't look safe to me!!

As I wandered around the parking lot trying to find a way out, I saw the OTHER side of this rig.  This caused me more distress than the french fries!!  The bed of the pickup is separating from the cab ... about six inches worth, which means the tires are rubbing against the fender.  Definitely the truck frame is bent.  YIKES!!!  As he crossed over the driveway, the front wheels came off the ground.  I stayed WAY far away from this wreck waiting to happen!!!

It was a nice day until I got home and discovered Miss Jessie had been sick.  It's a good thing I had both dogs locked in the bathroom with the tile floor.  Good heavens!!  There's nothing that can ruin your day like cleaning up nine  ..... okay, I won't go into the details.  I let her out and made a mad rush to get the back door open, but wasn't in time.  Two more spots to clean.  Poor baby girl -- I have no idea what caused all that!!  Thank goodness she was fine the rest of the night and appears to be back to normal this morning.  Oh the joys of PET OWNERSHIP!!

Now to start on my latest needlework project.

You KNOW Where I Was

Once again, the Magic Kingdom arose out of the shadows, played all the games and disappeared into the night.  That's a good thing.

I spent the better part of the morning looking for Cooper's toys in my closet.   I think I said before, he's fanatic about his toy balls.  There are so many around the house in various stages of disintegration that I picked up a wicker basket just for them.

He knows where he "stores" them, usually under something where he can't reach.  My antique armoir, the kitchen stove and my bedroom closet are his favorite places.  When he decides he wants one, he barks ... loud enough to make your ears ring ... until I finally get up and go get it for him.  He has me well trained.

Yesterday he was barking at the closet door.  I found nothing.  He continued to bark until I returned to the scene of the crime, got down on my hands and knees and looked some more ... to no avail.  Thirty minutes later, he was STILL barking.  Cooper is never wrong.  If he says there's a ball there, believe me, he is ALWAYS right.  It just takes the HUMAN longer to find it than it takes the DOG.

Can you find the ball?  I'm not sure if Cooper was weird before I got him or if "I" made him that way.  Yup .... he hid his fabulous stinky, wet, chewed-up, half-the-cover-missing ball in my good running shoes.  His second favorite place is in my cowboy boots.  He got the ball, I closed the closet door.

I waited as late as possible to head to the Magic Kingdom, as I had fair warning most of the castle guards would not be present.  I put it off until the very last minute.  The group meeting in the bar before heading downstairs to the masses was a short one with only three of us present.  I fortified myself with a round of popcorn.

It's not a problem really .... I've handled the entire sales table by myself in the past, counting AND collecting tribute presented by the peasants.  Luckily at the last minute, not one but TWO gals came to help out.

Lots of new people showed up since one of the other big games in the County is shut down for the summer.  To make it even MORE fun, this is the third Tuesday, meaning there is no money in the peasants leather purses.  Alas, they have cracked the piggy banks of their children and grandchildren in order to play extra speed coverall games.  When you're trying to rush 120 people through the sales table and they've got handfuls of change, it can be a challenge.

In the past, I never counted it until they left the table.  No more gambling on the correct amount friends ... I've been shorted too many times, even with your guarantee it was absolutely, positively correct!!  Hope springs eternal that the embarrassment of holding up the line will keep them from the piggy banks, but so far that's not happening!!

The good news .... everyone yelled BINGO really loud so no one missed out ... there were no knock down drag out cat fights on the floor (yes, it's happened before) and everyone went home happy, especially me since I balanced the infernal machine.  Next week is payday for most, so the remaining intact piggy banks should be safe.

Here's an interesting piece of sculpture for you.  Sorry for the blurry picture.  I was trying to be surreptitious.   Not that it mattered, because my friend would have gladly let me capture this interesting piece.  Isn't it cool?  Maybe not if you aren't a fixit-gadget-machine type of person, but I LOVE it.  I think I would rather put some kind of clock in the middle, or maybe even make a lamp out of it.  Tom Westerfield can do this in a heartbeat!!  He can probably even tell you what every single gauge did in it's prior life.  If you have a bunch of gauges you want to get rid of, give me a shout out!!

Today I hope to be off for Morgan Hill.  I know .... UGH, freeways!!  It's over-the-hill so to speak and probably an hour or two drive away, but it's the closest needlepoint store I can find for supplies to complete the four canvases I have.  Least that's my plan.  After a late night of bingo and an early morning of puppy, I may lose my momentum.  It is a beautiful sunny day ... so hopefully that will keep me motivated.

That Was A Close Call

Believe it or not, it's STILL raining in California.  Not that I mind because I like the sound of rain hitting the roof.  My ground has been pretty saturated for some time now, so I hope that means the water tables are up.  It sprinkled most of the day, making my mind run circles around the 75 cookbooks I have in my kitchen collection.

Trust me, a cookbook does not a Chef make.  I wanted to do something with all that leftover ham besides eat it straight out of the fridge because it tastes WONDERFUL.  The only thing I could come up with was Mac 'n Cheese.  I'd like to say I'm good at this one easy recipe, but I'm not.  

My mom made the best Mac 'n Cheese ever.  I don't know if it's the cheese ... a difference in the butter and flour for the roux ... or maybe whole milk versus the 2% in my fridge.  I guess I just have to keep trying.

I cut up the ham with no visible signs of blood on my fingers, before starting the water for the pasta.  I discovered this day that all pasta is not the same.  Your macaroni and MY macaroni are different in many respects.  Who knew???

I dumped half a box of Kroger elbow macaroni in the water and gave it a stir.  Once is usually sufficient.  Three minutes later I stirred it again to discover it was all stuck together.  Weird.  Another ten minutes went by and it was STILL stuck together in a big lump on the bottom and hard as a rock, in spite of the boiling water.  I stirred it again and again.

In the meantime, I made the roux and dumped in three different types of cheese.  Maybe that's the problem .... my mom only used cheddar.  I tested the pasta again.  It needed a couple more minutes, so I busied myself cleaning up the mess.  That should do it.  I grabbed the pot of pasta and dumped it in the strainer!   PLOP!!  What????  It all came out stuck together in one huge lump.  

I'm serious here .... one solid man-sized lump of macaroni.  I started laughing so hard I almost dumped the whole thing in the sink.  I can already see the shovel in my mind's eye as I dig a hole in the rain.

Since I had no other pasta in the house, I dumped it into the sauce and gave it a stir.  It's got cheese and ham, so it can't taste TOO bad!!!  Finally the macaroni separated ... sort of ... as it was drenched in ooey gooey sauce.  STILL not as good as my mom's, but it was at least edible.  That was a close call!!!!  I almost ruined my record of no burials this month.

Since I was already blowing my diet, I took some leftover hamburger and ground turkey to make a small meatloaf.  No instant pot this time, although you can use it, so they say.  I'm pretty sure it would not come out with crispy bacon if you did.  Dinner was served!!

I spent the rest of the day sewing in between constantly checking my phone messages for word on the house.  They have an offer in for their new house and are waiting to see if THAT seller will fix some problems.  Once that is agreed to, I will get the contract to sign for MY house and send along a deposit.  I have ten days for inspections, which are already set up.  It's a waiting game.

I tried hard not to just sit on the couch.  I cut and sewed the borders for this Halloween quilt, watched lots of television and played with the puppies.  Waiting stinks!!

I think for the next few days I will take my house one room at a time and make a LARGE donation pile.  I might as well get ahead of the game since I saw California legislators have drawn up some sort of law that will make them their own country.  As an accountant, one who knows what it costs since I worked in the County Offices for 21 years, I just can't believe it!  How in the world do they expect to pay for anything without all the Federal Aid they get??  Once people figure out they are going to donate 50-70% of their income to the State, they'll be leaving in droves.   

Take your foot off the soapbox Nancy ........ let's not go there until it happens!!!

The Smell Of Pork

There's nothing like the luscious smell of roasting ham wafting on the breezes in the kitchen.  It permeates the entire house.  GOSH that smells good!!!  I don't know why I double checked the label, but it's a good thing I did.  My plan for the 8 pound hunk of ham was to cook it for 20 minutes per pound.  Come to find out it was only 7 pounds and the directions said 15 minutes per pound.

I will admit up front that this is NOT my ham.  Mine was cooked in a very old roasting pan ... remember the blue one your grandmother had?  Once the bell rang, I covered it in the glaze (which I've never used before) and put it back in for ten minutes.  

My next plan was to cut it in half for transport to the dinner table of my long time friend Diane and her daughter Shelby, accompanied by her son Braden ("B") and Diane's husband.  I started cutting it apart and taste testing, which made me totally forget about taking pictures.  I was in ham heaven!!!  I have to say mine looked better.  

With one success in the books I started on the cowboy green beans.  I've never made good green beans in my life.  They are always cooked unevenly, and generally are either soft as mush or raw.  These were perfect!  The secret of course is the Instant Pot.  Fry up some bacon, take it out and fry half an onion, add the bacon back in.   Didn't I already give you this recipe??

Cut the green beans and place them in the strainer in the Instant Pot with one cup of water on the bottom.  Set it to manual pressure for 2 and ONLY TWO minutes.  Quick release the pressure.  In less than six minutes total, they were ready to be smothered in bacon and onions with a little salt and pepper.  The best part ... they are still GREEN instead of Army Mud color.  I'm so proud of these!!!!!

Off to the party I went, not suspecting mimosas along with a couple of huge strawberries Diane grew in her yard.  Little did we know while we were trying to take THIS pictures, Diane's husband was taking a picture of our BUTTS!!!!!  No, I'm not going to show you that one!!

They do it up right at their house ... B had to follow the bunny trail around and around the house to find his Easter basket.  They cut out a circle with three small circles above it as a template and sprinkled baking soda over it, making bunny footprints.  Cutest thing ever if you have young grandchildren.

Brunch included ham, a delicious green chili and ham quiche, Diane's cheesy potatoes, green beans and fruit.  In no time, we were stuffed to the brim, which is exactly when B wanted to play "fight the magic dragon" down the hallway.   I even got my own sword!

It was a beautiful morning with lots of sunshine that didn't last long, so when I returned home, I whipped up a batch of cheesy potatoes for myself.  This one is a keeper folks, especially if you need something easy for those RV rally pot lucks.  

One cube of melted butter mixed with 16 ounces of sour cream and 3/4 pound of grated sharp cheddar.  Add that to a 30 oz bag of thawed hash brown potatoes.  Stir well and bake at 350 for about 40 minutes.  I cut that recipe in half (using even less butter) and actually used leftover (already cooked) potatoes I cut into small chunks.  I threw in the ham because it was SO good.  I know this is how I usually end up with cemetery material, but this time it was WONDERFUL!!!

There's nothing like being focused on food all day!!  It didn't help that the rain started coming down around 2:00 and hasn't stopped.  In case you were wondering what Jonathan had for Easter dinner, it was his usual.  He's pretty finicky when it comes to his dinner plate.  

There is sunflower mix with a couple of peanuts in the shell, cut up apple and carrots, peanuts OUT of the shell, extra sunflower seeds (no shell), half a Ritz cracker to keep some weight on him and his bird biscuit full of sweet potato that he refuses to eat otherwise.  Yes, birds are a pain in the patoodie.  Occasionally I give him bananas, pieces of peanut butter cookie (his all time favorite) and chopped eggs.  Yes that is a dried hot pepper in the middle, which occasionally he picks at, but mostly that ends up in the trash.   My advice .... never get a bird!!

It's looking good for the Arizona house ... it may even close as early as May 15 if I can get my act together as far as the required paperwork.  That's where I'm heading today ... to the bank for a letter of credit.   

HAPPY EASTER!!!

HAPPY EASTER everyone on this lovely sunny Easter Sunday morning.  What better way to celebrate Easter than with a newborn baby giraffe!!  This drama has been unfolding in New York for the last two months since the Vets told everyone she was due any time.  I'm pretty sure that was a ruse to get people watching .... and waiting .... and donating!!

This is April and her new baby boy.  He looks pretty big for a newborn, but I can attest to that fact since I watched him come into the world yesterday morning.

He fell to the ground with a whoomp, which is nature's way of slapping him on the butt to get his breathing started.  Mom was immediately attentive.  In fact she was SO attentive that I'm sure I heard the baby say "MOM ... would you leave me alone?  NO MORE KISSES".

His first steps were understandably a little wobbly, what with those three foot long gangly legs being a little hard to control.  In the wild however, they have to be up and ready to run away from any predators lurking about.  It was no different here in the paddock. 

In less than ten minutes, he was up and moving around the area like a cute little drunk as Mom continued to lick every square inch.  Maybe pushing him around a little was her way of getting him to use those long legs.

In no time he found breakfast and got in a few sips before crashing to the ground, which was a long way for this baby boy.  After all that work, a little nap was in order, but he couldn't quite figure out what to do with that long neck.  His head swung back and forth as he dozed off, just like me at Bingo.

There's so much cuteness here!!!  Within 60 minutes he was loping around the paddock like a pro, stopping every few minutes for a little more sustenance.  I'm sorry these aren't better images, but Babies R Us and the zoo do not have very good video equipment.  If you want to check him out, go on Facebook and search for Giraffe Live Cam.  If you don't see the baby right off, don't worry.  He has taken to sleeping right under the camera, out of view.

Although I did spend a lot of the day watching the baby, I had to get busy with the ham cooking.  Lucky for me my friend called to ask if I wanted to go paint.  Not her house ... the big thing around here now is going to "someplace" (like the winery just East of town) and step by step, painting something you will never want to hang on your wall.  Thank goodness I passed on this one.  

They gave each person a canvas already painted with one color and only three other colors to work with.  You painted whatever you wanted.  They will all be photographed in some kind of order and made into a book.  I'm thinking this was a trick to show people have no talent ... but on the other hand, maybe it will make some magic picture in the end.  I'll let you know how that works out.  

At any rate, wasn't I happy she mentioned dinner on Sunday.  Wait ... what??  You said SATURDAY! Well that was apparently just a slip of the tongue.  I'm glad I had NOT put the ham in the oven yet.  

Since it's Easter, I can't leave without a picture of Easter Eggs.  Aren't these fabulous?  Can you imagine the kids just smashing these right and left as they peel and eat them?  (Actually, they have all been emptied of their contents).  In the old days, we were just glad to color them plain jane red or purple.  Maybe we wrote our name with crayon, which when dyed, remained white so you could read it.  There was nothing like what you see today, tie-dyed, stickered, flowered and bejeweled.

So this morning I'll be busy cooking that ham for brunch at their house.  I hope everyone has an enjoyable day ... and please remember the REAL reason we celebrate Easter!!

Spring Babies!!

Springtime is the time for new babies.  On the ranch, we spent many hours riding through the herd of cattle looking for cows who were calving.  When those calves hit the ground, they were worth a lot of blood, sweat and tears, not to mention dollar signs.   We spent a lot of time making sure they were A-okay.  There's nothing cuter than a baby calf.  Well maybe a baby giraffe!!

Back in New York, there's a new baby being born as I type.  April the giraffe shown here, has been on everyone's radar for the last two months.  I'm not sure if they guessed the date wrong or not, but people have been watching April "live" ever since the Vets told people she was going to have her baby any time (which was two months ago).  I was lucky ... I just clocked in last night and this morning there was BABY ... almost anyway!!

She's still in labor, but don't worry, I won't show you any graphic pictures.  Everyone is pretty excited, including her paddock-mate/hubby next door.

While I watched the Giants WIN last night's game against the Colorado Rockies, I finished up this needlepoint canvas.  Now to find someone to mat and frame it ... which will probably end up being me.  Needlepoint is fast becoming a lost art.  The last two shops I could buy canvas and thread from (a mere 2-1/5 hours drive) have closed.  It's a sign of the times I suppose, but I'm sure going to miss it!!  That is when I finish the last four canvases I have .... which should be in about ten years!!

AND WE HAVE A NEW BABY GIRAFFE!!!!  Congratulations April!!!  150 lbs of baby, born at 6:56 California time.  Baby is already holding it's head up and moving it's legs around.  Proud dad is running circles in the paddock next door.  

Another Halloween project ... I just LOVE Halloween!!  This was all done on my new embroidery machine.  It's a learn as you go process.  The batting I used is WAY too thick, make the panels stiff as a board.   Now that the sections are sewn together, I'll add black borders for my first embroidery masterpiece.  Nope ... no idea where I'm going to hang it.  It's not exactly COWBOY!!

In an effort not to be wasteful ... I mean really, what can you do with a leftover cup of cream ... I whipped up another 15 minute batch of Instant Pot flan.  Made with 1% milk this time and the leftover cream, it can't be all THAT bad calorie-wise.   I can tell you it's DELICIOUS!!

It's good to have a success just before cooking an Easter ham.  Not really "cooking" but heating with lots of goodies to give it more flavor ... like pineapple, cloves or whatever you are supposed to use.  I haven't gotten that far yet, so I better get my act together!!  The cowboy green beans with bacon and onions will be a snap in my Instant Pot.  

Baby (I just can't stop watching) in twenty minutes, has control of his/her neck and is trying to stand up.  That's a pretty amazing feat when you've got three-foot long legs.  You just want to stick your hand under it's belly and help just a tad.  I'll have pictures for you tomorrow!  It's as cute as a button!!

News Of The Day

My Magic Kingdom hangover is cured and my skinned lip is finally healed up.  I'm on a roll!!  I ran some errands yesterday, including a stop at one of the local tire companies to check on new tires for my Jeep.

There are SIX tire stores in this small town.  They are a dime a dozen, kind of like the SEVEN Dollar Stores, with new ones popping up all the time.  That's why I shop out of town, although I do occasionally hit a dollar store when I feel the need for cheap plastic stuff or cleaning products.  It pains me to enter those stores, what with all the product cascading to the floors where it usually stays.  I'm getting off track here.

My first stop for an estimate was the husband of a friend, but unfortunately he wasn't there.  After waiting for ten minutes (a long time for me) the guy finally asked me what kind of Jeep I had.  Well ... it's a four wheel drive Jeep Liberty.  But a Liberty WHAT?  Apparently it makes a difference.  I had the sizes and wanted mud and snow tires, but I guess there are a LOT of those to chose from. The estimate came in at $1,095.00.  YIKES!!!

When I got home, I double checked the Jeep ... it is a Liberty Lattitude with Goodyear Fortera HC tires.  I'll be a little more prepared for the next estimate!

For those that don't read the news, me included, they have found a new species of spider in La Paz on the Baja Peninsula in Mexico.  Although that was on my bucket list to see, I think I'll just scratch it off.  They reported this to be the biggest spider ever found in the world.  Funny though, they didn't mention just HOW big it was.  Although it bit one of the members of the crew, he didn't die, so I suppose you're safe there, but the thought of running into a spider bigger than my hand just creeps me out.  So much for the important news of the day.

One of my stops was at a new "used" furniture store some distance North of town.  They posted this table on Facebook and I was hooked.  I'm probably jumping the gun here a little bit, but this soft turquoise table will fit quite nicely in my new Arizona home.  It's my signature piece that everything else will be built around.  The most crucial factor is it will fit in the back of my Jeep for transport South.

It wasn't hard getting it IN my truck to get it home, but getting it OUT was a challenge in weight distribution.  My truck sits really high, so it took some jockeying around to get it to the ground without damage.  It needs a little more sanding for that antique look and a coat of something to protect the finish.   

Then it was off for groceries since I totally forgot this weekend was Easter and I'm cooking the ham for lunch at a friends house on Saturday.  I like ham, but I like it better when it's not $25.00 like the Smithfield hams I love so much.  At that price, I could have bought an entire pig two weeks ago.  This $12 Hormel will have to do.  I'm not sure how I'm going to cook it ... ham is not my forte!!

In the meantime, I tested out a new appetizer recipe from KingsHawaiian.com.  You've probably seen this one before.  Cut a pack of rolls in half, fill with ham and cheese, then bake.  I was in trouble right off the bat when Kings Hawaiian rolls could not be found at my local grocery store.  Remember, I'm in booney heaven here.  I substituted the only other sweet rolls in the store.  That was the first mistake. 

Although the recipe called for Dijon mustard, I only had honey mustard in the fridge.  Mixed with mayo, it was pretty yummy for the sauce.  I placed what I thought was a sufficient amount of thin sliced ham over the rolls, then covered that with Swiss cheese slices.  I put the tops on and mixed the sauce to be poured over the top.  

I went a little askew there also, as I forgot to halve the sauce recipe as I did the rolls.  That was a LOT of butter, mustard and onion powder for just nine rolls.  Oh well ... onward and upward.  I baked them for the required 10 minutes, whereupon even the BUTTER did not melt, let alone the cheese.  Another ten minutes and they were getting toasty on the top, so I took them out, cut them apart and went in for the taste test.

Let me say the flavor of onion and butter was delicious.  I almost couldn't find the ham, and the cheese never melted.  FAIL!!!  It needs three times the ham and double the time in the oven, with only half the sauce on top.  I heated two up in the microwave for dinner and it was MUCH better.   Gosh ... I only have SIX more to eat!! 

I spent the rest of the evening watching the Giants lose AGAIN ... I mean really, they are in LAST place and just can't seem to get their act together.  It would definitely make a difference if the umps called the outs that are so obvious on the replays and quit calling strikes on balls that are thrown below the knees ... but that's how it is in baseball!!

If you're traveling for Easter, please drive careful and drive slow.    We all want you around for a LONG time!!

A No Show!!

Don't you just hate it when you make an appointment and no one shows up?    Nick and Terry Russell have been having the same problem on the EAST Coast.  It's SO frustrating!  Not that I have a lot of other stuff to do anyway, but I COULD have stayed in my jammys all day.

Since the light show at my house was scheduled for 5:30, I had all day to wander from one corner of the house to another.  That's when I discovered I'm almost out of bird biscuits for His Highness Jonathan, who gets waited on hand and foot.  I don't mind baking them at all, but when it comes to cleaning this pan, it's a bugger!!

No matter how much I spray it, which can't be too much because oil is not good for birds, stuff sticks to the bottom of each and every muffin hole.  That doesn't matter though .... Jonathan has lived 45 years because of good care ... I can't stop now!  That's just crazy when you think about it!!

Since I can never find anything to wear in my closet, I thought some Spring Cleaning might be in order.  SO MANY CLOTHES!!  I'm a keeper ... I've been keeping some clothes for over 35 years.  You know, things always come back in style.  I have some pretty cool outfits I'm keeping around for just that day.  Things like my motorcycle jackets, leather pants, three micro-mini bikinis and several pairs of sexy lingerie.  The problem is that I can't even BEGIN to get any of them on!!  

I have several long formal dresses with no place to wear them, four ski parkas worthy of Alaska mid winter and eight mini skirts that haven't seen the light of day since I found I could get away with wearing levis to work.   I found 25 running shirts along with 8 jackets (depending on whether I was running in the rain or not) that made me look like a donut wrapped in spandex when I tried them on.

As you can see by the hangars, I got rid of quite a few.  You would think this would free up LOTS of closet space.  Well, you're looking at it.

With one red wool coat exception that I couldn't even get one arm in the sleeve, three of these bags were squished into that space.   It's hard to let go.  I blame it all on my mother who even saved her used pieces of aluminum foil.  I might need these clothes one day.  You never know when I will magically lose 30 pounds and they will all FIT perfectly again!!!

To be honest, one bag isn't as full as the others ... it has four pair of tall boots with five inch high heels.  Yes, I can still get those on, but they do tend to make it a tad hard to walk.  In between, I was able to let loose of four pair of extremely well worn running shoes.  Yuck ... who wants those???  The baseball caps went too, except for the one from New York, two from Barry Bonds and five from the Giants baseball team.  I don't even WEAR baseball caps.  

By then it was close to 5:00, so I ate quickly with the expectation of hearing a knock at the door.  Nothing.  By 5:45 I was looking out the windows waiting for the trucks to drive up.  Nothing.  By 6:30 I changed clothes and parked myself on the couch, ready to watch the baseball game.  I don't know why, because I think the Giants have only won one game so far this year.    

It's okay the gardeners were a no-show.  I didn't need more lights anyway and it just saved me the stress of telling them no.  Now of course I will stress over him showing up unannounced in the next few days.  

Today I'm off to run errands and get groceries ..... and maybe I'll take another quick look at my closet.

Hangover City

It's one of THOSE mornings.  I'm tired, sore, achy, cranky and wish the world would just go away.  Not from drinking mind you, but from the joys of working the Magic Kingdom of Bingo operation.  It happens to me every Wednesday morning.

You know the feeling ... it CAN'T be 5:30 YET.  Lay down ... it's NOT time ... as I roll over and try to cover my head.  My eyes are scratchy, my nose stuffed up and I just want to lay in that warm bed for the next four hours.  LAY DOWN!!  60 seconds later, I roll over the side of the bed, hanging on to the nightstand so as not to fall on my face.  Double UGH!!!

My plan was to sneak into the Magic Castle and wander up the back stairs for a coke ... all that sugar helps keep me awake ... and a dinner of popcorn.  They have WONDERFUL popcorn.  Along the way however, I noticed the table and chair crew forgot to set up the cash register table.

I don't say this in a bad way at all, but everyone who volunteers is OLD.  We are either limping, walking bent over or using a variety of devices to keep us upright.  That means the table installation belongs to me, after I search the hallways and byways looking for one.

I found it.  Laying on top of another table.  That made it easy to raise the legs and flip the little metal circle in place.  Too bad it didn't stay there.  The leg promptly came lose and tapped me on the head ... something like a hammer.  I finally got it to stay while I lowered the table to the floor, where it rested with a thump on my toe.  Thank goodness for cowboy boots.

No one told me it wouldn't fit through the door when opened up.  My stubborness kicked in.  I collapsed the legs, went through the door and set the whole thing up AGAIN.  No one appreciated my effort ... no one even noticed the table wasn't there in the first place.  I climbed the stairs for my coke, rubbing the knot on my head.

We only had two instances of drama ... both events centered around their inability to yell BINGO.  If I paid that much for cards and I won, you would hear me screaming in the next County.  The thing is, if you do NOT yell Bingo and the caller calls the next number, you are out of luck Charlie.  It's the rules.  It's not OUR fault if you don't yell loud, but the entire crowd gets up in arms because you didn't pay the poor lady.

When you DON'T pay the poor lady the SECOND time she wins, even though those at her own table didn't hear her, the crowd gets really surly, as does a volunteer or two who magically disappear for the night.  Seriously ... she won TWICE and never yelled Bingo loud enough for ANYONE to hear.  It doesn't help that ALL the volunteers are hard of hearing but really, you should yell like you won the lottery!!!   We harp on that rule at the beginning of every night, but no one listens.

While I'm usually home by 9:30, this time I was still counting money and was on my third coke in an attempt to stay awake.   We balanced perfectly, the Castle Lawyer and I as we kept slapping each other on the back to stay awake.  I made it home just in time for all that coke to kick in.  I was wide awake!!

All my little fall-asleep tricks didn't work.  With the latest ibuprofen scare, that's been taken off the table, causing me to toss and turn all night.  Please puppies, let me sleep in!

I try very hard not to have anything scheduled on the day after, giving me time to get my bearings back.  When my gardener knocked on the door so excited because he had found some outdoor lighting he could install, I could hardly turn him down.  I told him I had that work done two years ago, but he insisted.  It's FREE!!  They will come and set it all up so you can see what it will look like.  Then they will show ME (the gardener that is) how to install it.  

I didn't have the heart to burst his bubble.  He has replaced all those sprinkler valves at no charge.  So tonight ... at least it's not until 5:30 ... they will come and put more lights around my house so I can see how nice it will look.  It will take me at least that long to come up with some way to let him down easy ... I really don't need any more lights.

In the meantime, though I'd like at times make Cooper disappear (like at 5:00 in the morning), my grumpiness has cut him short of play time.  I'll try to catch up today.

I've no idea what Instant Pot meal will magically appear tonight, I'm still only thinking about my morning coffee and pretending to be a lump on a log.  Hopefully the Magic Kingdom of Bingo hangover will dissipate quickly.