A Fairy Tale Night

 I blinked yesterday, and landed back in the FairyTale Land of the Magic Kingdom.  We used to meet up beforehand to plan our strategies should the peasants revolt.  Basically that involves deciding which door we will use as our escape hatch.  On this day, I was the only one there, talking to myself.

To better engage their lucky charms without having to buy and actually EAT the cereal variety, many peasants have paid the price to become new members.  You see, members have the codes to the gates, allowing entry to the dungeon in order to stake out their territory long before any other peasants arrive.  

There are always excuses to be allowed access across the moat earlier than the strike of the clock.  None of them work, but when it's hot outside, they are allowed into the ante room.  No matter how many times I closed the middle door, I found it open three minutes later with the peasants inching across the line drawn in the concrete.

Having 90 minutes to gather my wits, I set up slowly, happy in the knowledge that one of my old cohorts would be here to help me count.  She's an accountant too ... a definite benefit to the King.  Too bad she called and cancelled.  With two new recruits chomping at the bit to help out, I delayed the inevitable as long as possible.  I would have a new recruit to count the cards.

Although professing to have done this many times, the card names seemed elusive, as did the actual counting of same.  It's hard to relate the importance of 1, 2, 3, 4.  I finally just hit the keys on the infernal machine by what I saw with my eagle eye.  Otherwise, I'm sure I would still be there.

Somehow the above numbers came out something like this.

And so the night drug on ever so slowly, although I'm happy to say one peasant came up and thanked me for keeping the line moving so fast.  She didn't even have to carry a chair along with her for the mother-in-law to sit because it was taking over an hour to get through the melee.  It's nice to know the peasants appreciate my efforts.  

Truly, I've been doing this since I was 15 years old and worked at the theatre with those old machines that spit out a ticket at the touch of a button.  Remember the costumes we used to wear?  I was so proud!!  Imagine getting PAID $1.00 an hour to watch all those movies!!

Anyway, the dungeon kitchen was spitting out food right and left, along with stomach fire a dragon would be proud of.  I requested a chili cheese dog this time, from one who flung her long hair around so much I was sure to get something inedible.  Not that I would notice in the chili ... which by the way was delicious Costco chili.  I'm definitely ordering that again, in spite of the requirement of one Tums.  It was better than the usual TWO pieces of fire suppression equipment I take upon arriving back home after a hamburger.

And that's it ... a fairy tale night.  No fights, no hair pulling and even the infernal machine spit out it's balancing tape with the exact same amount of cash I had in the till.  Hoorah!!!

To make it even more interesting, next week I will be training not one, but TWO new recruits.  Truly, it's as easy as 1, 2, 3.  Sadly that seems to come out as 3, 1, 6, 12, 8.  Maybe a pre-bingo glass of wine will make it better!!!  I do miss the Castle Lawyer!!!