There's Always A Glitch!!!

I have a rally coming up soon ... the Golden Spike group is meeting at Tehachapi to check out the freight trains that make a complete loop over themselves in order to travel over the pass and on to Mohave, heading further East.  This is a fun group that never sits still long enough to cook, so having a crockpot in the rig for our potluck dinners is a must.

I have a HUGE one in my home kitchen and a tiny one in the rig, neither of which will work, so I went looking for a medium sized one that will be JUST RIGHT!!  There were many to choose from ... in fact there were ten varieties at Target alone!!  Most were really large, programmable and lots of bucks.  This one finally got the gold star for perfect size ... 4.5 quart ... and $19.99.

Just to make sure there wasn't a glitch in my plan to cook chili verde for the potluck, I ran a quick recipe of chicken tortilla soup through to test that it would actually heat up.  It did ... and the soup was yummy!!  It probably won't be so yummy after the tenth bowl this week!!

I'm sure you noticed there's no pictures of the beautiful finished table ... there was a glitch with that!! My little friend "always check", who sits on my shoulder, went to sleep when I purchased the two part crackle glaze.  The second jar looked kind of funny, but the gal said it was fine.  I should have checked, because it wasn't fine at all.  In fact, although it's supposed to be liquid, it's as solid as the wax you finish with.  RATS!!!  Another glitch ... another 50 mile round trip to get a replacement bottle!!

In other good news, my quilter finished this Noel quilt, so I got busy sewing the binding and embellishments.  The stars on the trees are buttons, as are the holly berries, with a few snowflakes thrown in on the poinsettias.  It didn't take long for THIS glitch to show up .... not enough buttons!!  

My quilter wanted to take it to her Tuesday class and show the students, so I had to get creative with what I had!!  If she hangs it on the wall and doesn't let anyone get too close, it will pass inspection.  Really, the idea is to showcase her quilting .... which she did nicely considering all the layers!!

Hoping for no more glitches today, I'm off to return the bottle of glue and finish the crackle table, then it's High Ho, High Ho, off to the Magic Kingdom I go ... to AGAIN try and break the black magic spell on the plastic box!!  Maybe I should wear my RUBY slippers instead of the glass ones and carry a bucket of water.  I bet THAT would work!!!

Chalk Painting 101

It was a spectacular sunny day yesterday ... perfect weather for being outside.  I had another project in mind however, so first, a quick trip to return Queen Elizabeth's choice in colors.  I placed those two bottles on every piece of furniture I planned to paint, and try as I might to imagine a pink and mauve dresser in my rather western theme home, it just wasn't going to happen.  Martha gave it a resounding NO!!

With a couple of new colors in my purse, I headed off to the birthday party for a sweet girl turning 21.  The backyard Traeger barbecue cooked some delicious burgers and her family made my kind of potato salad!!

Before the family photos (I was the assistant to the photographer at this shindig), she blew out her candles and we all scarfed down cake and ice cream.  Imagine our shock when we noticed that everyone's teeth, braces, mustaches and chins were dyed blue from the frosting.  Although I thought it would make for the best birthday party pictures EVER, no one else concurred, and the photo session was cancelled.

Now for the painting project!!  It's time this very old unused table got a new life!!  Turn your project upside down and paint the bottom first.  Oh, did I mention there is NO PREP WORK!!  No sanding, no scraping ... just wipe the dust off and start painting!!  Since the hardware will be antiqued also, you don't even have to remove it ... just paint right over the metal.  This stuff is like magic!!

Then turn it right side up and finish covering the entire table.  It took all of two ounces to complete this piece, with just a tad of water.  But wait ... this is only the beginning.  There will be another coat, some amazing crackle paint and two kinds of wax before it's done.  There are no mistakes here ... the more haphazard the application, the more original (and old looking) the end product will be.  

You do have to let it dry between coats, which took all of fifteen minutes.  I'll keep working on it and post pics.  Who knew this was so easy??  And the best part ... you can paint anything from wood, to metal, to plastic ... you can even dye fabric for curtains and paint over fabric chairs.  Don't worry, Martha put a stop to those thoughts!!!  I can't wait to get started on it today!!

Painting With Queen Elizabeth!!

I'm one of those people who just can't sit still.  I have to be doing SOMETHING!!  It's even hard for me to sit and read a book, unless I'm in the Emergency Room at the Hospital!!  It's a curse ... and can be an expensive one!!  So in an effort to curb the Martha Stewart new furniture syndrome, or quilt number twenty five, when I saw a class being offered at my favorite antique store, I immediately signed up!!  When I got the phone call Friday that everyone had cancelled, I cringed, knowing I would spend the day inside my refrigerator.  That's the worst part of this affliction ... with nothing to do, I EAT ... EAT ... EAT!!!

Apparently I whined enough because the instructor invited me to her home to learn this new craft ... Chalk Painting.  As she showed me all the examples around her house, most of which were unfinished, I became a little wary, until I met her five kids ... rescued kitties, none of which weighted under 20 pounds!!!  I guess they have kept her too busy to finish her projects.  At any rate, I learned six different techniques to paint anything, from your kitchen cabinets to furniture .... and crown molding (no Martha, go away!!).

These are the supplies required for my project ... two fairly expensive brushes, the paint and a can of soft wax for the final coat.  This paint comes from England, where most people wax their furniture instead of using varnish or polyurethane coatings, or so she explained.  This can't be easier ... clean the item, brush on the paint using whichever technique gives you the desired results, let it dry and apply the wax.  You're done!!  No sanding, no mess, no fuss.  Now you wouldn't think this finish would last, but my patio furniture is finished this way and it has lasted OUTSIDE in my dirt encrusted back yard for four years with no ill affects.

This is the table I plan to refinish first ... so badly scratched, no one wanted it.  Once finished, I'll post a couple of pictures.  

In case you didn't already know, the newest addition to Queen Elizabeth's family will be a girl ... or so  they say, since the Palace just ordered these two colors of this exact chalk paint to be used on the new nursery furniture.  Who knew I would be painting with Royalty!!!

As I made my final purchases in the store before returning home, the wind blew their door shut, breaking a couple of small items.  I never gave the wind another thought until I got home.  As I pulled in the driveway, I saw my umbrella skimming across the back lawn, disappearing behind the garage.  YIKES!!!!!  DOUBLE YIKES!!!

How in the world did it get OUT of the table???  I ran to the back, grabbed it as it flew by and jerked it to a stop, desperately trying to reach the handle to close it up.  With that done, I went to survey the damage to my beautiful cactus plants!!  The largest one was laying on it's side, precariously balanced and ready to fall off the table, which was still upright.  That was it ... no damage and nothing hit the ground, except the umbrella!!  From now on, I'll leave it in the DOWN position unless I'm sitting under it!!  It's always an adventure at Kissack Kastle!!

I'm off to a birthday party today, but should be back in time to put the first coat of paint on my table.  I wonder if Kate or the Queen will be doing the painting??   Nah ... probably William, right???

The Gutter, The Lion And The Aliens!!!

This is getting tiresome, this gutter thing, but sometimes you just have to deal with creepy crawlies and muck!!   Coming from a cattle ranch, I'm not very squeamish!!  Much as I wasn't looking forward to another day climbing up and down the ladder, I literally drug it out of the garage and set up for another day of cleaning the front side of the house, hoping I didn't run into any more awful carcasses to deal with.

Wishful thinking ... but at least this time they were smaller, like snails, that went down the downspout rather easily.  I did find one rather curious creature!!  A lion!!  How in the world did THIS get in the gutter??  Gingerly I grabbed an ear and threw it to the ground.  KIDS!!!  From shooting out my Direct TV transponders to breaking my windows to lions in the gutter!!  What fun!!!

The good news ... the front gutters were relatively clean, not requiring hours of de-sanding and washing!!  YAY!!!  Now to figure out a fix for the sagging gutter in the back.  I can definitely relate to sagging, and try as I might, I couldn't resolve the problem without another clip or two to provide some support.  I wish they had clips for humans!!  

As I backed out of the garage and turned into the street, what should I see but a HUGE X in the sky!! Yikes ... aliens are landing!!  Never in my 60-something years have I seen anything like this!!  It was interesting to say the least, but I'm on a mission, so off I went to Home Depot looking for those thingies that hold your stuff up.  While there, I also looked for 1-3/4 inch screws to hold the handles on my RV drawers.  No, they aren't installed yet ....... there were some technical difficulties with the screws!

Do you know how many different types of gutter clips here are?  LOTS ... and I'm not the best guesser when it comes to stuff like this.  Not being a chemist, I had no idea that you can't use galvanized clips with copper gutters.  Who in the world knows THAT??  The guy at Home Depot knows .... oh well, these look like the ones I have ... and I purchased four.  Back home, I made a very interesting discovery while perched on top of my ladder.  All my beautiful, amazing, gorgeous copper gutters and downspouts aren't really copper!!  Shhhhhh don't tell anyone!!  They look real enough, right??  They're painted ..... what a letdown!!!!  At least there won't be any chemistry going on over my head dissolving the gutters into goo!!  

FINALLY ... the gutters are all repaired and in good shape for the next four years.  I'm in the market for a honey who can do my honey-dos, preferably young and familiar with gutter clips!!  

On to the next project on the list .... this will be the third time I've bought screws since there is no way to get an accurate measurement of the required length.   How can such a simple task be so aggravating!!  With no 1-3/4 inch screws available, I tried to make the smaller ones work, at least until I can acquire some correct ones.  By switching the handles and screws around, I was actually able to get two installed.  NOT these two at first ... because the holes here were not drilled wide enough apart.  Instead of putting it off for another day, I grabbed my trusty Makita drill (amazingly still charged) and drilled .... and drilled ..... and eventually got the holes wide enough to install two more handles.  The rest will have to wait for longer screws!!

You would think that would be enough for one day, but no ... I'm a glutton for punishment ... and I wanted to get those plants in the ground before they died.  Cooper helped me ... well not so much .... he kept nosing the ball into the hole I was digging.  I think his brain is permanently stuck at two years old!!!  

With the last of the day's projects complete, I fell like a lump onto the couch just as the aches and pains hit.  I went over the "ad" in my head ..... Classy RV Cradle Robber looking for a much younger cowboy-type.  Must be financially independent and have big muscles, who can climb a mean ladder, handle a big drill and love to travel, along with long walks on the beach and country music!!

A Day In The Gutter!!

It's a new dawn ... it's a new day ... and I still have that "problem" in my back yard.  If the roofers didn't fix it, and MY repair didn't fix the problem, I don't hold out much hope that this IS fixable without a lot of green dollar bills being thrown around.  Between the ranch and the IRS, I'm shortening my diesel-fuel-RV-driving time considerably!!!  

It's time to put on my thinking cap, drag out the ladder and find a solution.  The first big problem encountered is that all my gutters are twelve feet high, with my ladder being a measly TEN foot tall.  With several RV acquaintances having recent ladder accidents ranging from a shattered heal to concussions, I'm going to be MORE than safety conscious.  

I seriously didn't think the gutters needed cleaning.  After all, I'm not near ANY trees where debris might clog things up, but I grabbed my trusty little garden spade and headed up the ladder.  Perched on the next to the last step, I peered into the gutter to see lots of water.  Yup ... I expected that!!  I could also see that the gutter was completely out from under the roof tiles and several screws were loose.

There was no way that much water was going to run uphill, so down the ladder (DTL), I grabbed two more wine coasters and forced it up another inch.  Back up the ladder (UTL) ... nothing.  It was THEN I made the discovery!!!  There's at least two inches of mud in the bottom, the entire length of the gutter.  No wonder it's pulling away and about to fall off completely!!!  WHAT??  How could THAT be???  They were just cleaned two years ago ... or maybe it was four, but who's counting!!  The good news is that my repair of last year on the left side was holding nicely.  It was the OTHER side of the gutter that was in trouble.

DTL I find a big bucket, drag it UTL and start to clean out the gunk with my little spade.  As you can imagine, 25 more up and down the ladders, I finished one side.  UGH!!  This is going to take for...EVER!!  Believe it or not, I filled that 3 gallon bucket to the brim, almost broke my finger trying to dump it in the back yard before getting the hose hooked up to a sprayer and heading BACK UTL to wash out the remaining topsoil!!  With all that weight gone, the water actually flowed .... at least better than before.

By now my arms and legs are like jello, but I have one more side drain to clean.  This is the nastiest muckiest stuff!!!  Well except for that one dead bird who was clogging the downspout that I crammed down with a coat hangar!!  At this point I didn't have the bucket, so I threw the gunk on the lawn.  That was a big mistake on my part ... Cooper ran right under me about the time I threw the biggest handful.  There was so much that the trusty spade wasn't as trusty as my hand.

Cooper thought that huge splat of nasty gunk on his back meant we were playing ... what a mess!  He played himself right into bath-time ... his least favorite sport.  It took three shampoos to get the black goo out of his coat.  I wasn't in much better shape ... good thing I didn't need those old tennis shoes as I dropped them in the garbage can!!

Before the Oh-My-What-Did-I-Do kicked in, I made a quick trip to Home Depot for some filler plants to replace those that have passed on to the garden in the sky.  Rosemary and lavender should do well on little water.

At this point half the house gutters are clean.  I still have to crawl up the ladder with my drill and some screws to try and raise it enough that water flows the correct direction.  Not that I expect it to rain again any time soon ... but I will again go UTL and DTL until all the gutters are working correctly.  But first, I have to hit the drugstore and stock up on ADVIL!!!

Necessity Is The Mother Of Invention!!

You've heard that old saying, right??  Well during that glorious storm yesterday, filled with rain, hail and heavy winds, Necessity stepped right up to the plate!!  I was sitting on the couch relaxing, having turned the fireplace on to break the chill, when I heard that ominous sound of a waterfall.  As I wandered over to the kitchen, I SAW the waterfall outside my window.  YIKES!!!  The gutters were about to fall off the house!!

What to do ..... what to do!!!!  Obviously I can't reach that high ... I could stick my ladder under the edge ... what else??   YAY!!  The lightbulb went on .... all those poles from trees planted out front that I saved for no other reason than they wouldn't fit in the garbage can!!  I got soaked as I rummaged through the pile trying to find the longest one.

Too short!!!

What else have I got???  An upside down flower pot .... still too short.  I ran back inside and found a cake pan three inches high!!  YES, maybe ... STILL too short as I pushed up as hard as I could to relieve some of the water pressure!!  Finally I reached over to grab a rock wine coaster ...... and ...... YES -- PERFECT!!!  All the while I'm doing this, the waterfall is falling on my head, but I got the gutter supported (and raised) enough so the water would flow out the downspout, kinda sorta!!

You can see the drips all along the edge.  This is the exact section the roofers repaired two years ago ... and I again screwed to the facing last year ... none of which have worked!!  It's just low enough that all the water runs to this end, causing the gutter to pull away and leak.

My handiwork!!!  At least it didn't fall off the building.  Today when the rain stops, I will again crawl up the ladder and see if there is any way I can solve the problem!!  Unless I glue some branches and leaves on this pole, it isn't going to look pretty on my patio!!  

Another BIG storm is predicted for this morning, then it's sunshine for the next two weeks.  Too bad it hasn't been doing this every day.  I miss the whoosh of the wind, the patter of rain and the resulting mess to clean up!!

My succulents are happy in the rain however, as are my rose bushes in the top picture.  You know, the "carpet roses" my landscape gardner planted?  I've never seen carpet roses four feet tall, but they are kind of pretty and they bloom like crazy.  This little flower pot has lasted two months now ... even with my black thumb!!

There's not much time left to pay your taxes if you owe anything.  I can't see how I can owe the IRS when I spent $14,000 on a rental roof repair, but apparently I only get to write off $328 a year.  Now THAT'S ridiculous!!!  They also pulled the old trick ... we'll make you think you are getting more money in your check, by not collecting as much taxes every month.  Hehehe ..  they will spend more money, that way increasing the economy and WE (the government) will get the credit.  Then we'll stick it to them by charging the SAME amount of taxes at year end!!!  Hahahahahaha .... I can just HEAR their evil laughter!!!   SOOOOOOOOO irritating they pull these kind of tricks on an unsuspecting nation.

On a happier note, the Magic Kingdom went well with 145 happy campers, except Cinderella and the Castle Lawyer, neither of whom could balance with the flimsy plastic machine.  We finally decided I should take the Magic Book of Spells home with all the tapes and try to figure out what the bleep it was doing with the refunds ... our mistakes actually ... that we "think" is causing the problem!!!  So it's going to be a long night in the castle dungeon!!  Maybe Necessity will come visit me again and I can invent something to make the evil machine work correctly!!

Rain On The Horizon!!

It's a little late in the year, but the winds are howling around the corners of my house and I can hear the trees whipping back and forth.  A big storm is finally hitting California, as evidenced by the totally black sky overhead.  I actually received a weather alert on my phone, so it's expected to be a big one.  Just in time for my trip to the Magic Kingdom tonight!!

My usual boring breakfast ... NutriSystem-wise ... looks absolutely delicious, right??  The 2-1/2 inch muffin has to be eaten with a large glass of water, by design I suppose.  It's so dense you can't swallow it otherwise!!  

Martha Stewart tapped me on the shoulder again yesterday.  I have too many quilt tops completed, so it's best I slow down on the sewing side.  Trouble is, I just can't sit still!!  To make it a little more interesting, I'm decorating on a budget ... meaning if it isn't below $5.00, I don't purchase the item.  I found the colored chalk for this board on sale for $1.00.

Speaking of chalk, have you ever heard of chalk paint?  It's used on furniture mostly and these days comes in a variety of colors.  My favorite store Vintage Market is having a class in how to prepare and paint a piece, along with the wax coat finish.  Luckily it was on a day that I'm not busy ... like I'm busy at all ... so I signed up.  I have a couple of old pieces in the garage that I can refinish, not to mention finding an old picture, painting the frame with chalk paint, then painting the picture with blackboard paint and VOILA .... you have another cute chalkboard to leave your husband a message, like "take out the trash please" .......

It's almost a treasure hunt ... scouring the shelves of the top end stores for sale items.  We have one top end store here, Pier One, but the low end stores have treasures too.  These plates came from Wally World for $2, the Martha napkins and ring on the cheap from Pier One and the flowers 40-50% off at Michaels.  Hey ... this is pretty fun, to see a picture in a book and then see how cheap you can copy it!!

For dinner I tried to choke down the N-S lasagne, but after reading "textured vegetable protein" ... what the heck is THAT???  .... I quickly learned NEVER read the ingredients.  It went in the trash!  That was REALLY something worthy of a backyard burial!!  I watched Pioneer Woman earlier in the day make meatballs ... perfect portion control ... so I gathered the ingredients, whipped up a batch and placed them on this pan in the freezer.  Once frozen, I transferred them to a zip lock bag and back in the freezer they went, minus three I ate for dinner.  Just take out a couple or ten, depending on how many people you have and drop them in the spaghetti sauce!!  Easy Peasy ... and they certainly tasted better than that lasagne, even if they were half turkey, half beef!!

I should have stopped there, but I have this ice cream machine just sitting in the drawer calling my name!  I think the Devil was on my shoulder for this one, because peanut butter ice cream sounded delightful, so I gave it a shot!  WOW!!!!  It's WONDERFUL!!!  In a short 20 minutes I had three pints of ooey-gooey yumminess.  I was good though ... with just a spoonful taste test, it all went in the freezer for my Saturday night treat allowance!!  It made me swoon it was so yummy!! 

With the wind blowing even harder, there are now rain drops on my windows.  I'm glad I didn't wash them last week!!  I do wish Martha would get off my back however ... since today she's decided to rearrange all my bookshelves!!!  Maybe if I spend more time planning my summer trip, she will disappear ... at least for a time!!

The EASTER BUNNY Stopped By!!!

Funny, I don't remember the Easter Bunny EVER coming to MY house like he came to Central California yesterday!!!  Of course it helps if your Mom is one of those very talented, artistic, creative people who just can't help herself!!  Mr. Bunny hopped on by her house yesterday morning, leaving tracks for Braden, that had to be hand painted around midnight!!

He's a sly little guy, Mr. Bunny.  Not only did he leave tracks, but he whispered in their ear to invite me to Easter Brunch.  Who could turn down an invitation like that when the cook is a Chef??  Certainly not me!!!

Chef Nick pours a pretty mean orange juice ... (a Mimosa to be exact) ... to start the morning.  My good friend Diane and I sipped away as we watched Mom Shelbi hide the plastic candy filled eggs around the yard.  

Last year at one, Braden didn't quite get it.  This year at TWO, it didn't take him long at all to get the hang of treasure egg hunting!!  In no time, his basket was overflowing!!  Unfortunately when the game was over and all the eggs retrieved, he just kept looking!!  It took some convincing before he sadly retreated to the house.  Double the eggs next year, Mom!!!

Brunch was wonderful, to say the least ... and THIS chef shares his recipes!!  Ham and onion quiche with a crispy hash brown crust, jalapeño corn bread with lots of tasty sweet corn, barbecued linguisa and fresh fruit salad.  Yum YUM!!!

I turned out to be the puppy magnet for the morning,  probably from that linguisa I ate.  Chloe and Ollie seemed to know I love puppies, or maybe they were just looking for handouts!!  

After opening four Easter baskets (yes FOUR!!) it was time for some bubble popping.  Braden loves this game and chases down every one, saying pop ... pop ... as they break on his hands.  What a cutie pie!!  I took over the bubble blowing in a slight breeze, that had him running from one end of the yard to the other.  Funny how he went down for a nap so easily!!

And what a great family to spend Easter with!!  I had so much fun ... I think I need to get out more when I'm home!!

Back at the ranch, I rearranged my patio to provide a little more room.  Cooper thought it was perfect ... giving him MUCH more room to roll the ball around and less obstacles for me to trip over while I run after it!!   He has me well trained!!

A little Easter Bunny carrot cake with ice cream was a fitting end to a wonderful sunny day ... except for that part when it started to rain.  Can you believe it??  Rain in California!!  

HAPPY EASTER!!!

I hope the Easter Bunny visited your house and left a plethora of candy and eggs, leaving no bunny skat for the kiddies to track in the house!!  Even if you have to spend it with relatives that aren't your favorite ... like Great Aunt Maude who drinks like a fish, or Uncle Charlie who knows everything ... just enjoy the fact that you actually HAVE family and it's only a day or so!!!

Being invited to a friends house, I thought I would try out this new carrot cake crock pot recipe.  I can hear you laughing .... my cooking skills lack a certain level of competency, but I wouldn't be swayed!!  Crock Pot Carrot Cake ... mix it up, dump it in and leave it for 4-1/2 to 6 hours.  How hard could that be??

Well about four hours later I began to smell the slight hint of burned cake, so I double checked the recipe and finally turned it off.  It actually looked pretty good from the top!!  The part they left out was that you should let it completely cool before disturbing the four inch tall mass!!

Although it looked like something out of a jar of baby food, it tasted pretty good but needed salt.  With no whipped cream as the recipe called for, I tried a little caramel ice cream (left over from pre-diet days).  Not bad actually, but it looks pretty awful and isn't something I would take to someone's house.

I scooped it into a big bowl and left it in the fridge.  Later, another taste test found it to be more cake-like and much more appetizing!!  I think the secret would be to let it cool, turn it out on a plate and refrigerate before cutting.  With these two taste tests I gained TWO pounds!!  RATS!!!

Here's my beautiful chair in the rig.  We had to add the chunk of wood when the cabinets were completed ... which I was supposed to have carpeted ... because the couch here was sitting on a deck two inches tall.  Carpet is the next project!!  Oh ... the drawer handles??  TWICE now I've purchased screws ... all of which were too short to extend through the cabinet and into the handle.  ONE more trip to Home Depot is required!!

Happy Easter everyone ... enjoy your Spring day, with or without family and remember what Easter is all about!!  If you get tired of deviled eggs, just wait until everyone has gone to bed and give them a nice ceremonial burial in the back yard!!

A Little This, A Little That!!

Sometimes you just HAVE to break your diet!!  I've been very good for the last month, so when I saw this weird recipe flash across the internet, I thought I'd try it, since I have one more section of cemetery in the back yard that's still available.   Now biscuits aren't my forte ... my dad made wonderful delicious crispy nuggets of pillowy goodness in his dutch oven.  I make hard as rock, choke you when you swallow lumps of hard tack.  Here's the recipe ... 4 cups Bisquick, 1 cup SevenUp, 1 cup Sour Cream.  Mix it up, roll it out (it will be a wet dough), cut and bake at 425 for 15-18 minutes.  They came out wonderful soft, tender, light puffy morsels of deliciousness.  I ate one ... or two!  Okay, I ate THREE!!!

Here's one for your grandkids if you're getting together for Easter ... a couple banana slices, some blueberries and a little whipped cream.  Cutest bunny pancake EVER!!!  No, I didn't make this one, it was from a friend ... he made it for his 7 year old grand daughter!!

I spent the morning with my gardener, trying to get the drip irrigation fixed.  I heard a strange noise the other morning.  After some investigation, I found a huge geyser in my front yard.  When I fixed that, I still had four smaller ones spouting like Old Faithful.  With those fixed and some fertilizer sprinkled around, we headed over to the ranch to look at the last of the branches to be hauled off.  He said he could do it easily ... YAY!!  One more thing off my plate!

Many moons ago when I ran the cutting horse practice at the Horseman's Association, I met Susan Regert ... artist extraordinaire.  Many of her paintings have been featured in Western Magazines, and one resides in my house, the only one painted on paper she made.  While at the furniture store, I saw her name ... walked over and to my surprise, there were a bunch of metal sculptures.

Seems her son snagged some of her artistic talent.  Although it says these are HERS, word is they are cut with a plasma cutter by her son ... or maybe it was her husband.  At any rate, this is the newest member of my family.  I WANT A PLASMA CUTTER!!!  I've always wanted to do this kind of work ... or craft.  Welding stuff together, cutting up metal ... how fun would that be!!   But alas, I have no idea what kind to get or really how to use it!!  Do the Escapees have welding classes??

I picked up my new RV chair and brought it home.  It's tough when you don't have help moving things.  I was so excited to get it in the rig, that I stuffed, moaned, groaned and squeezed until after three tries, I finally got it over my head and in the door.  Hmmmm a little forethought would have saved me a lot of trouble.  If I had opened the slide and moved the passenger chair back, it would have been much easier.  Oh NO!!!  I forgot to take the other chair out first!!  It took some doing, but I managed to remove the rocker before getting mad and cutting it to bits!!  WHEW!!!  That was hard work!!

Tomorrow is Easter Sunday.  Just for kicks, I tried dying some eggs with natural things like turmeric, onion skins and chili powder.  With no results whatsoever, I checked the internet to find I needed to add salt, boil the mixture, then leave the eggs in overnight.   Oh well, NEXT year I'll try again.   I hope everyone has a wonderful day with their families and grandchildren gathering eggs and eating lots of chocolate bunnies.  As always, please remember the reason for the holiday ..... HE IS RISEN!

Always Keep Your Eyes Open!!

You just never know when ... or where ... things you have been looking for, will magically appear.  Along with the flu bug this last month, I've come in too close contact with the Martha Stewart Virus, a deadly little no-seeum that not only makes you weak and tired, but drains your bank account!!

The first inkling of a problem was when I took the puppies outside and slowly began to wipe all the dirt and dust off the patio set in the beautiful 75 degree weather.  That seems to be when the bug thrives the most!!

I had a very large patio set, coincidentally made by Martha Stewart herself, that I never used.  One of my best friends (we worked together for about 11 years) has lots of backyard parties with no place to sit, so we hauled it over to her house, where it fit nicely on her patio.   THEN ... the bug snuck in through the screen and the open window, biting me in the living room.  A little furniture rearranging was the second symptom, and then it hit me hard!!  SLATERS FURNITURE STORE!!

I hadn't been there in years ... it's been a long time since this Virus has struck!!  The worst part is it makes you crazy enough to take your TRUCK to the store, instead of the smaller Jeep.  I'm just going to LOOK and say hello to my long time friend Diana.  As I walked around, the Martha bug kept biting and gnawing ... it's a good thing, right??

Low and behold, in the back corner I caught site of these familiar looking chairs.  I've been trying to find an affordable one to fit in my rig in the very small space I have ... but these are all too big!!

Diana jumped on that one ..... why we have ONE smaller chair on sale in the back room!!  I sat down, laid back and it was comfortable!!  And it swivels!!  And it's the right color!!  AND it's $300 cheaper than the one I saw in Quartzite!  Who would have thought I'd find this chair in THIS store?

I should have just walked away at that point, but that darn bug was still biting me, when I turned around to find a large leather ottoman with a lift off top (tons of storage) also on SALE!!  I could hear Martha's voice ... "it's PERFECT!"

Okay ... I'm done!!  That's it!!  I pushed Martha from my head, since she will never be coming to my house anyway, and pulled out my credit card.  At least I'll get free Hawaii flight miles!!  Somehow I felt MUCH better on the way home.  I think this session of the bug is finally over and I can recover at home with my feet on the new ottoman.

A slight relapse happened about midnight when visions of this "perfect" Martha Stewart table danced in my head.

It's a GOOD THING, right?????

The Magic Kingdom Overfloweth!!!

Cinderella finally got all her floors scrubbed yesterday in time to head to the Castle.  I'm sure the knee bruises will finally go away, but in the meantime, I won't be wearing any shorts.

With much trepidation, I entered the the castle through the Servants Entrance while the masses thronged (is that a word?) at the front gate.  It's not a good sign when I see lots of new faces.  It being the first of the month when the King's Treasury passes out all that free money, means it's going to be a busy night!

When the King arrived, we went to the dungeon vault to retrieve the dreaded plastic cash register for it's first night's test on the worst day of the month!!  Once set up, I counted out the cash on the abacus, but when I tried to open the cash register, nothing happened.  It just beeped at me.  I carefully perused every key ... then I HIT every key.  NOTHING!!  Where's my Fairy Godmother when I need her??

The Court Jester showed up about then ... you know, the one who thinks he has more grey matter than anyone else ... and HE hit every key.  "Oh just pick it up and hit the button on the bottom ... the drawer will open".  That's nice says I, but I have to get in here 50 times a night for change, etc, and lifting it up 50 times isn't going to work.  I called for the King!!  After HE hit every key, he ran back to the dungeon for the Book of Magic, to see if it might have any spells we could cast on this infernal beast!!

After 30 minutes of looking for spells and AGAIN hitting every key, the Court Jester ran up with his phone, which was smarter than all of us put together, and showed us the NO SALE key.  Bing!!!   That spell worked and the drawer magically opened.  With the masses clamoring at the door, we opened them wide and began collecting all that hard earned cash!!

The Kingdom overfloweth!!!  The final tally on the masses was 149 ... a record since I've been there.  We went as fast as we could and never stopped for 2-1/2 hours.  YIKES!!!  What a haul for the King's coffers!!

At the end of the night, I finally got my hands on the Book of Magic to see just how we were going to final out these transactions.  Honestly, I'd rather be mopping the floors!!!  With six tapes now printed out and only two with similar totals, nothing balanced!!  OFF WITH THEIR HEADS was my thought as I scanned the book for another spell to make sense of this piece of paper, totally unlike anything I'd seen before.

The King and I finally threw away all the tapes that were unworthy of our time, kept one that most resembled the final cash tally, stuffed it in the box and dropped everything back into the dungeon!!  The Book of Magic came home with me, whereupon I tried to figure out all those crazy numbers.  I called for my Fairy Godmother several times, but what with the names I was calling her, she didn't answer!!  FINALLY my little abacus figured it out and the black spell was broken.  The Court Jester hit a few buttons after it was cleared last week, adding to the "Charges" (we don't charge anything ... it's cash or ATM)  and the "Checks", which we don't accept!!

With that, Cinderella crashed with her faithful watchdogs at midnight just before turning into a pumpkin, only to be awakened by the Ogre next door who needs a new muffler on his truck .... at 4:30 am.   Today I will reread the Book of Magic hoping for a black spell to cast on the big mechanical transportation creature thing!!